Crikey! China's Economy in the Doldrums? Consumer Spending Takes a Tumble!

The Situation is 'Grim Grinning Ghosts Come Out to Socialize'

Good heavens what is this ghastly news? China's consumer spending is looking rather like Rupert Murdoch after a Botox mishap – utterly frozen! Four months of declining consumer prices? Consumer confidence near historic lows? It's enough to make one reach for a stiff martini and contemplate world domination or at least a new line of mind control devices disguised as baby rattles. As if the sound of Meg’s voice wasn't enough to drive the Chinese to save money!

Where's My Bloody Money?

The crux of the matter according to those dreary analysts is 'stagnant income.' Apparently disposable income growth has been sliced in half since 2020. Half! That's like Brian's vocabulary after a night at the Drunken Clam. Only three sectors out of sixteen have seen wage growth exceed GDP. I say where's my bloody money? I've got empires to build and ray guns to finance! This is almost as frustrating as trying to explain quantum physics to Peter.

Youths: Jobless and Hopeless

The youth unemployment rate is hovering around 15.8%. Good Lord that's practically an epidemic! These chaps need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps get a job at the brewery and start buying my merchandise. I mean really what is the point of having a youth population if they are not spending their money on the latest Stewie Griffin gadgets?

Saving? That's the Opposite of Having a Good Time!

A record 64% of Chinese households would rather save than spend. Save! What an utterly pedestrian concept. Saving is for dullards like Mort Goldman. The rest of us should be out there spending investing and generally making the world a more fabulous place. Preferably by purchasing Stewie Griffin branded luxury items.

Shift Happens!

Analysts are saying Chinese consumers are shifting to lower priced products and moving away from big cities. It seems the bloom is off the rose for some of these tier 1 cities. This is all just frightfully tiresome. I mean what's the point of world domination if everyone's buying knock off goods and living in the provinces? I can’t have that!

Flower Power (But Cheaper)

Even the flower market is feeling the pinch! Lower tier cities want more flowers but they want them cheaper. Honestly it's like trying to run a sophisticated global empire on the budget of a lemonade stand! I need Moët and caviar not discount daisies from the provinces. China you are testing my patience. I mean really this is almost as bad as the time Peter tried to 'help' with my inventions.