Blast From the Past! Pixar Chief Reveals Steve Jobs' Midnight Madness

Steve Knew Best (and What He Didn't)

Good heavens have you heard? Apparently even the great Steve Jobs knew when to step aside. Pete Docter from Pixar – yes the chap responsible for reducing me to tears with those emotionally manipulative cartoons – revealed that Jobs despite bankrolling the whole shebang understood his limitations in filmmaking. 'This is not my business,' he'd declare. Oh the humility! Reminds me of the time I tried to bake a cake. Utter disaster. Brian ended up using it as a chew toy.

Decoding the Enigma: Jobs' Superpower

Now here's a bit of wizardry. Docter claims Jobs could saunter into any room regardless of his knowledge of the subject matter and within five minutes decipher the essence of the conversation. Five minutes! I can barely decide which diabolical scheme to unleash upon the world in that timeframe. This 'skill,' as Docter calls it apparently aided Jobs in solving problems. Honestly it sounds like something out of one of those dreadful superhero comics Brian keeps leaving around. 'With my power of deduction I shall save the day!' Ugh.

Practice Makes Perfect Darling

Docter reckons this analytical prowess came from years of practice. Not some innate talent bestowed upon him by the universe. Well that's a bit of a downer. I was rather hoping I could simply download the skill directly into my superior intellect. Still Docter admits he's been trying to improve his own analytical abilities. Good for him. Perhaps he can finally figure out why my evil plans keep getting foiled by a giant talking dog and a family of imbeciles.

The Dark Side of Genius: Midnight Calls!

Ah but here's where the halo slips. Apparently Jobs had a penchant for calling his producers at all hours of the night. Three in the morning? While they were on vacation? The audacity! 'He wants to talk to you about it you're on.' Docter chalks it up to passion but let's be honest it sounds like the behavior of a sleep deprived tyrant. Reminds me of when I tried to implement a 24/7 surveillance system in the Griffin household. Let's just say Lois wasn't thrilled.

Docter's Damage Control: Emails Instead of Torture

Docter bless his heart claims he's trying to avoid the late night call routine. Instead he settles for emailing people outside of business hours. 'I guess that's what my wife's trying to get me to stop doing,' he admits. Oh the modern dilemma! Is digital harassment any better than a phone call at an ungodly hour? I suppose it's a question for the philosophers...or perhaps just someone with a very strong cup of tea.

Take a Course on Buying Homes (As If!)

Oh and just when you thought this couldn't get any more mundane there's an advertisement for a course on buying a house. As if I Stewie Griffin would ever deign to participate in such a pedestrian activity! I'll simply acquire a real estate empire through sheer brilliance and perhaps a little strategic blackmail. Now if you'll excuse me I have a death ray to calibrate.