U.S. Economy Doing the Chicken Dance: Prices Up, Inventory Down, Very Nice!

High Five! Prices Go Up!

Jagshemash America! Borat here reporting live from the land of the free and the home of the…expensive! I go to the market and what do I see? Prices are higher than my excitement when I find a new picture of Pamela Anderson! The government says inflation is bigger than forecast. Even Nike maker of shoes for running away from bear say they lose billion dollars because of tariffs. Is very bad! I am very upset! Wah weh wah!

Trade War: Like Wife Carrying Competition But With Economies!

Inside the US economy is like a wife carrying competition but instead of wives they carry inventories. But because of the trade war with China there are fewer inventories. This is like when my neighbor steals my goat! Is very sad for my village! And now the sticker price of things go 'high five!' Ryan Martin from ITS Logistics say they put new sticker on millions of products. Even on underwear! How much to see naked?

E Commerce: Like Mail Order Bride But With Goods!

Even in the magical land of e commerce where you buy things with click of mouse (like I buy wife!) prices are going up. But online no sticker needed! Very convenient! Like when I find a good deal on internet! Survey say shoe sellers expect to charge more for shoes. Is like saying my mustache will be longer! Always true! This much 're ticketing' only happen during the pandemic when everything cost more. Like when I try to buy horse for travel! Everything is more expensive.

Inventory: Smaller Than My Swimming Trunks!

Retailers are afraid! They see trade war and think 'uh oh is bad!'. So they order fewer things. This is like when I only order one potato for dinner! The economy shrink by 0.5%. Is like when my village shrink because everyone move to America to see Pamela Anderson! Mr. Martin say they have only three months of inventory not six. Is like only having three bottle of Vodka when you need six! Unacceptable!

Empty Shipping Containers: Sadder Than My Donkey After Race!

Empty shipping containers sit longer at ports. Is like my donkey after he lose the race! No one wants them! During pandemic they rush back to Asia for refill. But now? No rush! This mean importers think peak season will be weak. Is like saying my jokes are not funny! Highly unlikely! West Coast ports see small bump but still lower than last year. East Coast do better because they don't depend on China. Is like my brother Bilo he depends on no one except vodka!

Economists Are Watching: Like Me Watching Pamela Anderson!

Economists watch all this like I watch Pamela Anderson! With great interest! Imports are trending down. Experts say tariffs are high and economy is slow. Is like saying my car is old and slow! Everyone knows! Mr. Martin say indecision is best decision because no one knows what will happen. Better to have lean inventories. Is like better to have small mustache than no mustache! But best to have BIG mustache! Chenqui!