Elon Musk is No Good, Very Bad! Tesla Stock Plummets Faster Than My Sister's Chances of Marrying George Clooney!

Elon's Political Shenanigans: A Catastrophe!

Jagshemash! Borat reporting live from... well not Kazakhstan because my neighbors keep stealing my potatoes. But I have news! Very bad news for Tesla investors and for Elon Musk who is looking more and more like Mr. Bean every day! This Adam Jonas from Morgan Stanley says that Tesla's stocks are going down down down faster than I can run from a bear! And why? Because Elon is busy playing politician! Is like trying to teach bear to dance very difficult and end up with someone losing leg.

New Party Same Problems: A Tragedy!

Apparently Elon created a new 'America Party.' America Party? More like 'America... Pffft!' (that's the sound of me spitting on the ground). He's fighting with President Trump over some bill like two cats in a bag! This Jonas fella says Elon is putting all his money and time into this party instead of making cars that don't spontaneously combust! This is big problem! Is like using finest silk to wipe bottom waste of good material!

No More Free Ride: A Pain in My Nonexistent Wallet!

The article says that this new law stops giving Tesla money for making electric cars. Elon says he doesn't care but Borat is not stupid! Every penny counts when you are trying to afford new pair of mankini! But still this Jonas say Tesla stock should go up eventually! Is like saying horse will fly maybe but I wouldn't bet my grandmother's teeth on it!

Tesla Down Bad! Very Bad!

Tesla shares have fallen more than 26% in year 2025! That's more than my sister's IQ! This is a disaster! All those investors they are crying like babies whose candy has been stolen. Borat feels their pain. Is like when I lost my… well never mind. Too graphic for this family newspaper.

The Expert's Opinion: 'Maybe Good Maybe Not!'

This Jonas man still says to buy Tesla stock. He thinks it will go up to $410! This is crazy talk! Is like saying Pamela Anderson will marry me! Possible but highly unlikely. Maybe Jonas is just trying to pump up the stock so he can sell his shares and run away to Tahiti. Very nice!

So What to Do? Nobody Knows!

In conclusion Borat does not know what will happen with Tesla. But one thing is certain: Elon Musk is very strange man. Maybe he should stick to making cars and leave politics to people who are already corrupt and incompetent! Otherwise Tesla stock will be in toilet! Chenqui!