Doh! Consumer Spending's a Mess! But Maybe Not... Mmm, Travel!

Woohoo! The Economy's a Rollercoaster!

D'oh! So like I heard the consumer spending thingy is all messed up! Some smarty pants companies like Walmart and Microsoft are saying tariffs are gonna make prices go up! That means less beer money for me! But then some fancy airline guy is saying 'The consumer is coming back with a vengeance!' Vengeance eh? Sounds like a good excuse to eat a donut!

Old People Buying Houses? Mmm Houses!

Apparently old folks are buying up all the houses! 'I want what I want I can afford what I want!' they say! Sounds like my kind of motto! They're living every day to the fullest which probably means they're eating all the donuts too! As for the youngsters they're all like 'Can I afford this?' 'What can I afford?' D'oh! Just buy the house kids! You only live once... or nine times if you're a cat!

Cars Cars Cars! I Love Cars!

Carvana that's a weird name says everyone was buying cars because of these tariff thingamajigs but now it's evening out. But hey they also said that consumer credit looks stable. I don't even know what consumer credit is but 'stable' sounds boring. I prefer 'woohoo' or 'd'oh!'

Pinterest and Budget Items: Not My Thing!

Pinterest? Sounds like some fancy way of wasting time. Apparently young'uns are searching for 'budget' stuff. 'Budget'?! I don't even know what that means! Does it mean 'less donuts'?! If so I'm out!

Sports and Travel: Now We're Talking!

Sports! Mmm football and overpriced beer! Some NFL guy says sports are in a 'different place' and won't be affected by all this consumer spending mumbo jumbo. And travel! Some hotel CEO is saying everyone's still traveling! Especially young people. Woohoo! I want to go to Moe's! Is that travel?

High Consumer Confidence? I Feel Good!

This hotel guy also said his business thrives when things are stable. Stable? Mmm sounds boring! Just keep the beer cold and the TV on and I'm good. High consumer confidence? I'm always confident I can eat another donut! Doh! I need a donut!