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Showing 81 to 90 of 130 news articles

Amazon unveils Vulcan, a touch-sensitive robot, promising to create new jobs instead of replacing humans entirely, while aiming to improve warehouse safety and efficiency. Maybe Bender could learn a thing or two! image

Good News, Everyone! Amazon's New Robot 'Vulcan' Won't Steal ALL Our Jobs (Just Some)

Wed 07 May, 2025 07:05
3 minutes to read

Prime Minister Carney tells President Trump Canada will never be the 51st state, sparking a battle of wills worthy of a Zapp Brannigan strategy session. image

Canada to Trump: Bite Our Shiny Metal Axe!

Tue 06 May, 2025 18:16
3 minutes to read

A new survey suggests contractors are optimistic, which could mean good things for Home Depot, despite some tariff-related hiccups. Basically, old houses need fixin'! image

Good News, Everyone! Home Depot's Future Looks Brighter Than Fry's Underpants!

Tue 06 May, 2025 10:24
3 minutes to read

OPEC+ floods the market, sending oil prices into a four-year nosedive, while Leela ponders if this means cheaper Blernsball tickets... or maybe just a new eye! image

Good News, Meatbags! Oil Prices Plummet Like Bender at an All-You-Can-Eat Buffet!

Mon 05 May, 2025 19:13
3 minutes to read

One-Eyed Leela reports on Bill Ackman's $900 million gamble to turn Howard Hughes into the Berkshire Hathaway of the 21st Century, or at least until the next ice age. image

Holy Guacamole! Ackman's Building a Real Estate Death Star!

Mon 05 May, 2025 11:47
3 minutes to read

Leela reports on Vance's bleak outlook for the Ukraine war, a minerals deal, and Trump's broken promises. image

Good News, Everyone! Vance Says Ukraine War Not Ending Soon (D'oh!)

Fri 02 May, 2025 09:24
2 minutes to read

Waltz out, Rubio in as interim, and Hegseth's in hot water for military plans leak on Signal, leaving the White House in a state of 'good news, everyone!' image

Trump's National Security Advisor Waltz Walks Plank After Signal Snafu!

Thu 01 May, 2025 19:14
3 minutes to read

Microsoft jacks up Xbox prices faster than Zoidberg scarfs down a dumpster full of hot dogs, leaving gamers feeling like they've been Nibblonied! image

Good News Everyone! Xbox Prices Soar Higher Than Bender's Bar Tab!

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:18
3 minutes to read

Tesla's board is finally looking for a new CEO, as falling profits and Musk's antics send the stock plummeting faster than Fry falling down a tube. image

Good News Everyone! Tesla Ditches Musk Like a Bad Case of Space Rabies!

Thu 01 May, 2025 06:55
3 minutes to read

Microsoft's latest earnings report shows Azure cloud business booming, proving that even in the 21st century, humans still rely on technology to avoid thinking for themselves. And they said I was the one-eyed weirdo! image

Microsoft's Cloud Soars Higher Than Zoidberg's Dreams: Profits Up, Earth Still Exists!

Wed 30 April, 2025 20:24
3 minutes to read