Doh! Trump Might Nuke Musk's Space Deals!

Mmm Contracts...

So lemme get this straight. Apparently some big shots in Washington are gettin' their undies in a bunch over Elon Musk's space stuff. Word on the street – or should I say word from some folks who know what's what – is that Trump told the Defense Department and NASA to start poking around Musk's contracts. Why? Because Trump and Musk had a fight! It's like when Bart and Lisa fight over the last Krusty Burger... only with more rockets and less clown themed meat.

SpaceX Marks The Spot... For Investigation!

They're lookin' at BILLIONS of dollars worth of contracts. That's more money than I've spent on Duff beer in my entire life! And get this they might even reduce SpaceX's role in some fancy new missile defense system. "Golden Dome" they call it! Sounds like a prize for the best bowler at Barney's Bowlarama. But seriously it's a big deal. Like when I almost single handedly saved Springfield from that runaway monorail. Remember that? No collusion!

To Cancel or Not to Cancel? That is the Question!

Nobody knows for sure if they're gonna cancel any of these contracts. They're worth about $22 BILLION. That's enough to buy a lifetime supply of donuts... with sprinkles! But the review is happenin' and Trump himself said he'd "take a look at everything." Sounds like he's ready to unleash the hounds... or maybe just some paperwork. "The paperwork!"

Marge Where's My Political Ammunition?

One insider said this whole thing is just for "political ammunition." Like when I "borrowed" Flanders' hedge trimmer to sculpt my head into a mohawk. Good times. Apparently Musk used to be buddies with Trump but then they had a falling out. Now it's like when I'm trying to assemble furniture from IKEA. Utter chaos!

Egos vs. Public Interest: The Ultimate Showdown!

Some fancy pants experts are worried that politics are gettin' in the way of like important stuff. Like national security! And the public interest! They say decisions shouldn't be based on "the egos of two men." Well duh! I learned that when I tried to build a birdhouse and ended up with a monstrosity. The bird flew away!

D'oh! We Need SpaceX!

Here's the kicker: SpaceX is kinda important to America. They're launchin' satellites carryin' astronauts and building spy satellites. Spy satellites! That's like something outta a James Bond movie. Maybe I should apply! Agent Homer...has a ring to it. And get this SpaceX is the ONLY company that can take our astronauts to the International Space Station. So if they mess this up we're gonna be stuck groundhog day! Doh!