Good News Everyone! Stocks Soar, Dive, and Fly Like Bender After Too Much Booze!

Salesforce: Resistance is Futile (to Acquisitions!)

Alright alright alright! Leela here your favorite one eyed captain and news reporter! So Salesforce that company that manages all your customer stuff had a bit of a rollercoaster ride. They bought another company Informatica which probably means more paperwork for Fry (who let's be honest still doesn't understand what they do). The stock went down 5% after the news because apparently even robots think they're buying too much junk. RBC Capital Markets is all like 'Whoa slow down there compadre!' Maybe they should ask Mom for some business advice? She always knows how to run a successful…monopoly!

C3.ai: Feeling Lucky? This AI's Hitting the Jackpot!

Meanwhile over at C3.ai things are looking up! Their stock jumped 23%! Apparently they lost less money than expected. Imagine losing money and people celebrating! It's like when Bender tries to cook – the lower the body count the better the day. They made more money than expected too. Maybe they're using that AI to predict when Fry's going to accidentally destroy something. Now that is some next level business intelligence. Good news everyone indeed!

Elon Musk Escapes! Returns to Company Duty Maybe?

Hold onto your hats! Elon Musk that guy who's always doing…stuff announced he's leaving his government gig. Something about Trump era work or something? The stock rose 3% on the news. Apparently people are worried he's been spending too much time 'saving the world' and not enough time making cars that can drive…poorly. It's like that time Zapp Brannigan tried to be a diplomat – let's just say things went boom. Hopefully this means he'll finally invent a car that can handle a simple U turn without going off a cliff.

Nvidia's Chips: Beating the Odds One Semiconductor at a Time!

Nvidia's chips are still cooking! They beat Wall Street forecasts even though they took a hit from those pesky China export restrictions. It's like trying to smuggle Slurm across the border – tricky but doable! Their stock jumped 3% and other chip companies joined the party. Seems like everyone's cashing in on the future. And also everyone is trying to ensure they are not short circuited which is something I can relate to.

Boeing Takes Flight: Deliveries to China Set to Resume!

Up up and away! Boeing's stock soared after announcing that airplane deliveries to China will start up again. No more trade war airplane delays! This is good for them because it will probably provide a new set of folks who might want to take a trip to the moon one day! They're even thinking about making more planes – 47 a month! That's a lot of metal tubes flying around hopefully they have none of Fry's safety inspections.

Beauty and the Best Buy: One Shines One Shudders!

E.l.f. Beauty is looking good! Their stock surged 22% after beating expectations. They're even buying Hailey Bieber's beauty brand for a cool billion! Talk about a makeover. Meanwhile Best Buy is having a bad hair day. Their stock tanked after missing revenue expectations. They blamed tariffs those pesky things that make everything more expensive. It's like trying to buy a Nibblonian on Earth – you're gonna pay a premium! A tariff's a tariff but the mystery box could be anything... even a tariff!