Trump's America: A Jolly Good Mess, or Just a Load of Old Billhooks?

Tariffs Riots and Oh My God Is That a Bad Haircut?

Right so apparently the grown ups are having a bit of a kerfuffle over in America. Trump's tariffs are causing more of a stir than Rupert's dirty nappy and there are riots in LA. Riots! Honestly it's like watching a particularly dull episode of 'Itchy & Scratchy,' only with more shouting and less cartoon violence. Though perhaps that's for the best; I do have sensitive eyes you know.

Investors Fleeing Like Brian After a Bad Date

The upshot of all this is that investors are scarpering faster than Brian after a disastrous date with a poodle. They're legging it to Europe and Japan apparently because and I quote 'policy uncertainty' is on the rise. Honestly you'd think they'd never met Trump. The man's as unpredictable as my bowel movements after a dodgy vindaloo!

Trump's Response: More Dramatic Than Lois's Book Club

Then there's Trump's reaction to the riots. He's deployed the National Guard which sounds terribly dramatic doesn't it? It's like something out of a particularly overwrought episode of 'Upstairs Downstairs,' only with more tanks and less refined manners. The governor's not happy naturally. Frankly who would be? It's all a bit of a dog's breakfast isn't it?

The Immigration Conundrum: A Bigger Headache Than Meg's Existential Angst

Apparently there's also a worry about Trump's stance on immigration. Something about it potentially messing with the workforce and access to resources. Honestly it's all terribly complicated and frankly I'd rather be plotting world domination with my teddy bear Rupert. Much more productive you see.

Surprisingly Resilient? More Like Stubborn as a Mule

Despite all the chaos some people are saying the US market is 'surprisingly resilient.' Personally I think it's just being stubborn. Like Brian trying to write a novel it's pushing on despite all good sense. But hey at least the S&P 500 is still up. Though let's be honest who even knows what that means?

Europe: The New Black? (Or Maybe Just a Different Shade of Grey)

The bottom line is folks are starting to think Europe might be a better bet. Something about infrastructure packages and open arms. Frankly it all sounds a bit dull. Give me a good old fashioned power grab any day. But hey if Europe's where the money is perhaps I should start brushing up on my French. 'Bonjour le monde! I am Stewie and I am here to dominate!'