Mmm, Berkshire Bazaar of Bargains! Buffett Swag, Squishmallows, and Chocolate...Doh!

Woohoo! Shopping Time!

D'oh! It's Homer Simpson reporting live from… uh… Omaha? Turns out Warren Buffett's got this crazy thing called the 'Berkshire Bazaar of Bargains,' and it's like… a Super Bowl for cheapskates! Twenty thousand square feet of showroom space! That's bigger than my dreams of winning the lottery! They got everything: Buffett shirts chocolate coins and… Squishmallows? Mmm squishy…

Buffett Babble... Blah Blah Blah

So this Buffett guy he's gonna talk about… tariffs? Market volatility? Sounds like the kind of stuff that puts me to sleep faster than a Duff Beer lullaby. But hey maybe he'll say something about donuts! He's also bringing some other guys named Greg and Ajit. Probably smart guys but are they as smart as me? I once figured out how to get unlimited donuts from the vending machine at work!

Squishmallows! I Need One!

These 'Squishmallows' are the hot ticket man! Plush Warrens and Charlie Squishmallows! They're like little huggable versions of billionaires! Whoa! The article said that they have new limited edition dog Squishmallow. That's great news! I will need one for Santa's Little Helper. Doh! Over 1,000 snuggly dolls per hour! That is a lot of snuggliness! And get this Berkshire owns the Squishmallow company now! Take that Flanders! And don't even get me started on those pillows with Buffett and Munger cartoons. I'd trade Bart's soul for one of those!

Books? Bo ring! (Except When Signed)

They're selling a book about Berkshire Hathaway. Blech! I prefer comic books! But if Warren Buffett signs it? Then it's worth more than a night at Moe's Tavern! And the money goes to help homeless people? Okay I guess that's alright. Maybe I should donate one of my old donuts. Nah!

Chocolate Coma Here I Come!

See's Candies is there! Woohoo! Chocolate coins with Buffett's face! It's like getting paid to eat chocolate! And toasted marshmallow chocolates?! Mmm I love camping. Last time I went camping I brought a flamethrower to roast marshmallows. Marge wasn't thrilled.

Ice Cream Shoes and Private Jets? D'oh I'm in Heaven!

Dairy Queen's there too! Dilly Bars for a buck! Buster Bars for two! I'm going to eat so many my pants will explode! And running shoes with the Berkshire Hathaway logo? Well I won't be running anywhere unless it's towards a donut truck. And get this they even got a private jet! It is amazing. I will be a jet pilot like in the movie Top Gun! I feel the need... the need for speed!