Donut Forget! El Salvador Says "D'oh!" to Returning Deported Guy!

Mmm Deportation!

Hey there news junkies! Homer Simpson here reporting live from my couch with a donut in one hand and a remote in the other. So this President Bukele fella from El Salvador see he's got this guy Kilmar Abrego Garcia and the U.S. wants him back. But Bukele's like 'Eat my shorts!' He ain't sending him back! Says it's like smuggling a terrorist into America. I mean can you imagine trying to sneak a terrorist past TSA? They'd find him faster than I find the last donut in the box!

Trump's Two Cents (Which Are Probably Worth More Than Two Cents)

So Trump's in on this too right? He's jawing with Bukele and his top guys are saying they ain't gonna listen to some judge who wants this Abrego Garcia guy back. Apparently this guy was kicked out by accident like when I accidentally joined the Stonecutters. But the Trump administration thinks he's a gang member even though the judge says there's no proof. It's all very confusing like trying to understand why Marge likes me. Wait why DOES she like me?! D'oh!

Even the Supreme Court is Involved! Ay Caramba!

Even the Supreme Court got involved! They told the judge to uh clarify her order. Like make it clearer than a beer at Moe's. The judge did and told Trump's peeps to give her updates every day. But Bukele's still like 'I bent my Wookiee!' Not gonna happen he says. He doesn't want to release terrorists. Makes sense I guess. I wouldn't want to release a hungry Lenny into the Kwik E Mart donut aisle either.

Media Schmedia!

Trump even started yappin' about the media calling them sick for wanting criminals released. Which is kinda like saying I'm sick for wanting donuts. I mean maybe I am but they're delicious! He also wants Bukele to take back as many criminals as possible! Seems a bit harsh doesn't it? Like telling Bart to write 'I will not skateboard in the house' a thousand times. Cruel and unusual!

Gang Member or Just a Regular Joe? Doh!

Turns out this Abrego Garcia fella has never even been convicted of a crime in the U.S.! But Trump's attorney general Pam Bondi says the courts decided he's a gang member. But the judge says 'Nuh uh!' It's all a big mess like when I tried to fix the plumbing and flooded the entire neighborhood. Bondi says it's up to El Salvador if they want him back. All Trump has to do is provide a plane. So basically it's El Salvador's problem. Huh. So the Supreme Court is kinda useless here. That's Unpossible!

Rubio Gets Involved. Excellent.

Then Marco Rubio jumped in saying it's arrogant for the media to tell El Salvador what to do. He also said foreign policy is up to the President not the courts. Which sounds kinda important and probably means I should go back to watching TV. Trump even got snippy with a CNN reporter! Asked how long he had to answer the question. Then he asked the reporter to just say 'Isn't it wonderful that we're keeping criminals out of our country?' Woo hoo! That's it folks! Homer Simpson signing off! Donut dreams!