D'oh! Oil Prices Do a Faceplant After Iran Misses the Target (Thank Goodness!)

Mmm No Kaboom!

Woohoo! Turns out those ayatollah fellas got a little trigger happy and sent a missile at a U.S. airbase in Qatar. But guess what? No one got hurt! No explosions no 'owies,' just a big ol' waste of perfectly good missiles. That's like when I try to make donuts and end up with a pile of… well let’s just say it's not pretty. Anyway because nobody went 'kaboom,' those fancy pants oil prices went tumbling faster than me down the stairs after a Duff binge. Down $4.53 a barrel! D'oh for the oil companies but Woohoo! for my gas money!

Duff or No Duff? That is the Question!

So the price of the black gold went down because some smarty pants investors think this whole thing might cool off. Some guy named Jorge Leon (not related to Lionel I hope... Mmm Lionel Richie) says everyone's hoping for things to 'de escalate.' Whatever that means. Sounds like something Mr. Burns would say while trying to lower our wages! But he also said that those fellas could close the Strait of Hormuz. Uh oh! Don't they know I got to drive to Krusty Burger? If gas prices go up again I'm blaming Iran... and maybe Flanders. Always Flanders.

The Strait of What Now?

Apparently this Strait of Hormuz is a big deal. Like a REALLY big deal. Some 20 million barrels of crude oil swim through that thing every day! That’s like… a lot of donuts! Rubio guy is saying Iran would be committing 'economic suicide' if they closed it. Sounds painful! He also thinks China should tell them to knock it off. 'Cause China uses that strait too. Maybe they should send them a strongly worded fortune cookie? Hey it's worth a shot.

Libya Iraq and Other Places I Can't Spell

Now they're talking about what happens if Iran gets all wobbly. Like that time I tried to stand on my head after too many Krusty Burgers. Apparently something bad happened in Libya a while back and everyone's worried the same thing could happen in Iran. And Iraq is getting all riled up too. So much drama! It's like an episode of 'Itchy & Scratchy,' but with oil instead of cartoon violence.

Saudi Arabia's Like 'Chill Out Dudes'

Even Saudi Arabia is getting in on the action! They're all like 'We're watching you Iran!' Remember that time they got attacked a few years back? Good times... for me since I was watching it on TV with a donut in hand. But these two countries Iran and Saudi Arabia are kind of friends now. Maybe they can just talk it out over a nice cup of tea and some crumpets? Or maybe a Duff. Everyone loves Duff!

Don't Have a Cow Man! We Got Oil!

Some fancy pants organization called the International Energy Agency says they have like a billion barrels of oil on standby. So even if things go south faster than me at a company picnic we should be good. Maybe. As long as they don't run out of donuts at the standby station. That's when things will REALLY go bad! Doh!