Doh! Judge Says Everyone Gets the Passport They Want! Woohoo!

Trump's Passport Plan? Worst. Policy. Ever.

Alright folks lemme tell you this whole passport thing was a real pain in my donut! Seems this ex President Trump guy wanted everyone to have only 'boy' or 'girl' passports. Like what if you feel like… a delicious glazed donut? Can’t put that on a passport can ya? According to this Judge Julia Kobick in Boston that idea was dumber than me trying to build a bookshelf! And that's saying something. She figured it was all sorts of wrong and blocked it faster than I can say 'Mmm donuts!'

X Marks the Spot... On Your Passport!

So turns out before this whole kerfuffle people could pick 'X' on their passport. You know for when you don't feel like a 'M' or a 'F'. Kinda like when I can't decide between Krusty Burger or a Duff Beer. Choices choices! Biden put it back but then Trump came along and tried to take away the 'X' again. It was more back and forth than me trying to parallel park the Canyonero! Thankfully the judge lady put a stop to it.

Class Action? Sounds Like a Fancy School Trip!

This judge she's a smart cookie (not as good as a donut though). She said this affects a whole bunch of people so it's a 'class action.' Sounds like a field trip where everyone gets sued but it's not! It just means everyone who wanted a proper passport can get one. Even if they want an X. I’m thinking of changing my middle name to X. Homer X. Simpson. Has a certain ring to it don't you think? Doh!

ACLU to the Rescue! Woohoo!

These folks at the ACLU they’re like the Springfield Fire Department but for rights! A lawyer named Li Nowlin Sohl said this ruling was a big win against being unfair. Good for them! They're fighting the good fight even if it means less time for… you guessed it… donuts!

The State Department: D'oh! No Comment?

The State Department? They clammed up tighter than my fingers around a beer stein! No comment they said. Probably busy trying to figure out how to make a passport smell like bacon. I’d buy that passport. Heck I'd eat it!

Freedom Rings (and Passports Get Updated!)

So bottom line everyone gets the passport they want! This Trump fella wanted to go back to 'boy' or 'girl' only but this judge said 'Eat my shorts!' Now everyone can be happy. And that's what it's all about. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to celebrate with a Duff and a dozen donuts. Doh!