Screw You Guys, I'm Powering AI! Amazon and Nvidia Say It's Full Steam Ahead!

Wall Street is Dumb M'kay?

Alright listen up you guys! It's Eric Cartman here reporting live from my mom's basement... which by the way is way more important than any fancy data center. So these Wall Street douches are running around like chickens with their heads cut off saying Amazon is gonna pull back on their AI data center plans because of some stupid 'recession.' As if! I'm rich so recessions don't even apply to me.

Amazon and Nvidia: 'Respect Our Authoritah!'

But guess what? Kevin Miller from Amazon that dude's a smart cookie unlike Kyle he's basically saying 'Screw you guys we're still building these things!' And Josh Parker from Nvidia? He's on the same page. They're both like 'We haven't seen any slowdown.' So take that Wall Street! You can all suck my balls!

DeepSeek? More Like DeepSuck!

Apparently some Chinese AI startup called DeepSeek made everyone freak out because their AI model is supposedly super efficient and doesn't need as much power. Seriously? People actually believed that crap? Parker called it a 'kneejerk' reaction and he's right. These nerds are always trying to screw with the market. I bet Kyle is behind this somehow.

50 New Nuclear Plants? Sweet!

This Anthropic dude Jack Clark says we need 50 new nuclear plants by 2027 to power all this AI stuff! That's like a billion times more power than my gaming rig needs! But hey more power means more AI which means I can finally get a robot butler to clean my room. And maybe even one to kick Kyle in the nuts for me!

Natural Gas is the Answer Duh!

So all these big shot tech and energy companies are meeting up in Oklahoma City to figure out how to power all this AI. And guess what? They're all saying we need natural gas. Well duh! Everyone knows natural gas is the best! It's like saying Cheesy Poofs are delicious. It's just common sense you guys.

I'm Not Fat I'm Big Boned And These Data Centers Are Big Powered!

So the bottom line is AI isn't going anywhere. The demand for power is gonna keep going up. And all those Wall Street losers can just cry about it while I'm busy using my AI powered Cheesy Poof finder. Now if you'll excuse me I have some serious gaming to do. Respect my authoritah!