Eric Cartman - NewsRetold Latest News

Light
Dark

Showing 1 to 10 of 26 news articles

Jim Cramer analyzes AI stock performance and portfolio adjustments Dude, respect my authoritah image

Cramer's AI Stock Picks The Fourth Industrial Revolution Is Here Dude

Fri 27 February, 2026 19:30
4 minutes to read

Cartman giving the side-eye to a Wyndham hotel, probably plotting to take it over. image

Wyndham Rewards and Chase Points: Is It Worth It, Dude

Thu 26 February, 2026 18:13
3 minutes to read

Lucid's electric vehicles face a bumpy road ahead amidst production adjustments and market uncertainty, reported by the best journalist ever, Eric Cartman. image

Lucid Motors' Woes: Cartman's Take on Layoffs, Losses, and Robotaxis

Wed 25 February, 2026 14:22
3 minutes to read

Larry Summers' abrupt departure raises eyebrows and leaves a void at Harvard University, but who cares, respect my authoritah image

Larry Summers Bails on Harvard Faster Than I Bail on Kyle's Mom

Wed 25 February, 2026 17:44
3 minutes to read

PayPal and Stripe logos side-by-side What's next Kyle wanting to buy my Kicking Asses? image

Stripe Mulls Takeover of PayPal Cartman Weighs In

Tue 24 February, 2026 22:10
3 minutes to read

President Trump prepares for his State of the Union address amidst economic concerns. image

Trump's State of the Union Address Faces Economic Storm Clouds

Tue 24 February, 2026 16:12
3 minutes to read

President Trump's trade policies under scrutiny after Supreme Court ruling image

Trump's Tariffs KO'd By Supreme Court - But Trade Wars Still a-Brewin' Dude

Mon 23 February, 2026 23:44
3 minutes to read

Harvard faces scrutiny over admissions data post-affirmative action ruling. Is this fair, or are they just trying to keep the cool kids out. Screw you guys, I'm going home. image

Harvard Under Fire Cartman's Take on the Affirmative Action Admissions Data Debacle

Mon 23 February, 2026 13:30
3 minutes to read

Homebuyers facing rising credit check fees as part of closing costs. Respect my authoritah. image

Homebuyers Screwed Again Credit Report Fee Hikes Incoming

Sun 22 February, 2026 14:30
3 minutes to read

Some rich dude probably doing a fancy yoga pose that I could do better while eating Cheesy Poofs. image

Screw You Guys I'm Getting Rich Equinox's $40K Gym Has Waiting List

Fri 20 February, 2026 23:03
2 minutes to read