Trump Trade War a Great Success! Or Is It a Very Naughty Blunder?

Trump Makes Kazahkstan Look Like Very Nice!

Jagshemash! Borat here reporting live from... well not from Kazakhstan. Is too dangerous there. But I have heard about the Great Leader Trump and his trade war. My sources very reliable sources like my neighbor Nursultan Tulyakbay say this trade war is like throwing Jew down well – very very bad! Bolton man who used to whisper sweet nothings into Trump's ear says this is 'not the way you treat your friends.' Very unfriendly!

Tariffs? I Like Tariffs. Is Nice!

Trump put tariffs on everyone! 10%! Like slapping entire world in the face with smelly fish! But according to Bolton this is good for China. China now laughing like hyena at picnic! Trump thought he was doing a 'reciprocal' thing like when I try to kiss Pamela Anderson but everyone saying is stupid like horse with small brain. Economists very angry call it 'nonsensical.' Like trying to milk male cow!

Wealth Erased! Like My Dignity!

Markets went crazy! Trillions of dollars disappeared! Like when I wore that green swimsuit on the beach in America! People very upset. Trump put a pause on the super big tariffs but still everyone pays 10%. Even friends like Mexico and Canada who already got slapped with 25% tariffs. Is like saying 'I love you' and then kicking you in the groin!

China Strikes Back! Is Like Wife When I Forget Anniversary!

China they are not happy! They put tariffs on American goods too! Now it's like a fight in mud wrestling pit. Trump puts 145% on Chinese stuff China puts 125% on American stuff! China says they will 'fight to the end!' Is like my wife Azamat fighting over last piece of horse! Very serious!

Bolton the Wise Man Speaks!

Bolton he agree China is naughty for stealing secrets and cheating on trade. But he say Trump should gather friends like Japan Korea and even those European countries. Then all together tell China 'You are being very bad!' Instead Trump fighting with friends and helping China! Is like shooting yourself in the foot with a very big gun!

Xi Jinping's Charm Offensive! Very Nice!

Xi Jinping the big boss of China is now going to Vietnam Malaysia Cambodia. He is building friends! Bolton says Trump is making everyone hate America! China saying they are 'island of stability'! Like saying I am good husband! Very funny! Trump is shredding America's reputation and Bolton is very worried. Very very worried! Chenqui!