Bite My Shiny Metal Euro! Bulgaria Joins the Cool Kids Club!

Another One Bites the Euro!

Greetings meatbags! Bender here reporting live from… well not Bulgaria. I’m too busy perfecting my shine. But word on the street is Bulgaria's finally getting its act together. They're joining the Eurozone in 2026. That's right another country kissing the Euro's shiny metal posterior! They must be fans of my work. I'm 40% Euro you know. Literally if you melt me down and recast me as coins probably.

Inflation? I Hardly Knew Her!

So apparently Bulgaria had to jump through some hoops to get in. Something about 'inflation' being too high last year. Sounds like a personal problem to me. But they managed to get it down to a measly 2.8%. Good for them! Now they can inflate their egos instead. Speaking of inflation my ego is inflating just thinking about all the Euros they'll be printing with my face on them. Hey a robot can dream can't he?

Requirements? What Requirements?

Turns out joining the Eurozone isn't as easy as raiding a liquor store. There are 'requirements,' like 'price stability' and 'government deficit limitations.' Sounds boring. I prefer my stability in the form of a full bottle of Ol' Janx Spirit. And deficits? I create deficits every time I bend a girder! Still gotta hand it to Bulgaria they jumped through all the hoops. Now they can finally start bending the rules... I mean contributing to the European economy. Yeah that's it.

Lev ing the Old Embracing the New!

Goodbye Bulgarian lev! Hello Euro! They're ditching their old currency which let's be honest probably wasn't made of shiny metal anyway. One Euro equals 1.96 lev. That sounds like a bad deal for the lev. But hey progress right? Now Bulgarians can finally understand why everyone's always complaining about the price of gas. Welcome to the club suckers!

Mixed Feelings? More Like Mixed Drinks!

Apparently not everyone in Bulgaria is thrilled. Some nationalist parties and the president are against it. Probably because they can't stand progress unlike me! Prime Minister Rosen Zhelyazkov is all for it though. He's probably just trying to get on my good side. Smart move. I might let him polish my chassis. Maybe. Anyway mixed feelings are for mixed drinks. And I plan on mixing a lot of them to celebrate this momentous occasion.

Council Has the Final Say But Bender Has the Last Laugh!

The council of the EU gets the final say. Big whoop! I'm pretty sure I could convince them with my undeniable charm and irresistible wit. And maybe a well placed bribe of shiny objects. But even if they say no I'll still find a way to profit from this. Maybe I'll start a black market for bending Euros? The possibilities are endless! Remember me!