Screw You Guys I'm Rich! Pennylane Doubled Its Worth Thanks To Euro Funding!

Respect My Authoritah! More Money for Those Frogs!

Oh my god you guys! You're not gonna believe this. That stupid French company Pennylane those guys who do accounting software somehow managed to get even RICHER! They just got a whole bunch of Euros like 75 million of them! And now their company is worth like 2 billion Euros! That's like a bajillion dollars or something. I'm so jealous! Seriously screw them!

Kick the Baby! Funding Details I Don't Really Care About

Apparently some fancy pants venture capital firms like Sequoia Capital and Alphabet's CapitalG (whatever that is) are throwing money at these guys. It's all about getting in early so they can make even MORE money. It's like a freakin' pyramid scheme but with spreadsheets or something. I don't know I stopped paying attention in math class to watch Kenny die.

Beefcake! How Pennylane Works (Supposedly)

So what does Pennylane actually DO? Well they say they're an 'all in one' accounting platform for accountants and small businesses. So they do all that stuff like expensing invoicing and trying to figure out where all the money went... I bet even THEY can't figure out how much money Cartman gets every year to spend

Screw You Hippies! Europe's Next!

Here's the really bad news: these guys are planning on taking over Europe! Starting with Germany! Apparently France wasn't enough for these guys. Now they want to spread their accounting garbage to other countries. It's like a freakin' zombie apocalypse but with taxes! They plan on hiring even more people to do their stupid number crunching. I can't believe it! They want to grow to 800 employees! I hate people!

Blame Canada! AI is Ruining Everything!

Of course they're using that stupid AI now. Apparently they're using it to automate the books and so that people can do other things. They call it a 'co pilot'. Like AI is going to make anyone smarter?! I hate AI and I hate technology! It is the source of all the evil in the world!

I'm Not Fat I'm Big Boned! Big Market Opportunity!

This lady from Sequoia Capital Luciana Lixandru says that new invoicing rules are a 'massive market opportunity.' Oh so it's all about making money? Of course it is! These guys are all just greedy capitalists who don't care about anyone but themselves! Just like me! Wait... I didn't say that.