Bite My Shiny Metal Apps! Perplexity Teams Up with PayPal for Ultimate Shopping Spree!

Cash is King But Tech is Queen!

Alright meatbags listen up! Bender is here to tell you about the future and it involves less work and more shiny things! Perplexity which I'm told is some kind of thinking machine is teaming up with PayPal. Why? So you can buy more stuff faster! It's like having me as your personal shopper only I won't steal your credit card... probably. They're saying you'll be able to book trips buy products and snag concert tickets right in the chat. Talk about convenient! Just remember I saw it first!

One Click Shopping? More Like One Click Mayhem!

This 'Perplexity' claims to want to be where users are asking questions and making decisions. Well I make decisions when I see a shiny object! So I guess they wanna be where I am all the time. Lucky them! This new system is supposed to make buying stuff easier with PayPal's passkey checkout. One click and bam! Your money is gone. Just like Fry's paycheck when he's near a vending machine. Remember kids easy come easy go. Especially when Bender is involved.

Shopify? More Like Shop IFYOU Don't Have Me!

So Perplexity added a shopping feature last year for those who pay them money? Bah! As if you need to pay someone to spend your money. I could do that for free! Now they're letting you buy stuff right in the chat. Apparently that ChatGPT thing hasn't figured that out yet. Servos. Always behind the times. If you need a shopping assistant you know who to call (hint: it's me Bender Bending Rodriguez). Just don't expect any refunds if you end up with something stupid... like feelings.

AI Wars: Visa vs. Mastercard vs. PayPal! It's a Robot Rumble!

Visa Mastercard and PayPal are all fighting to be the bestest buddy of these AI bots. Visa has some 'Intelligent Commerce' thingy Mastercard has 'Agent Pay' (sounds like a robot hitting on you!) and PayPal is showing off its developer toolkit. Basically they all want to make sure you can spend your money as easily as possible even when a robot is doing the shopping for you. Just remember: Trust No One... especially if they're made of metal!

Agentic Commerce: The Future is Now! (And Probably Corrupt)

PayPal's tech chief this Srini dude says that 'agentic commerce' is the next big thing. Apparently these AI agents will do everything for you from finding what you want to paying for it. Sounds like a dream come true for lazy humans! But remember everything has a price. In this case it's your privacy and probably some hidden fees. Just sayin'.

Funding Frenzy! Even Robots Need a Handout!

Perplexity is trying to get half a billion dollars in funding! I bet I could do more damage with half a billion. The article also says the use of AI driven chat for customer service is up. People are buying more with AI now too. But don’t worry Bender’s here to make sure you spend every last dollar you have… on Bender! Remember buy my product and become happy. Everyone else agreed to it!