RAV4 Gets a Hybrid Makeover! Oh Good Grief...

What in the Name of Rupert is This?

Good heavens have you heard the news? Toyota the blighters are turning the RAV4 into a hybrid only affair by 2026. A hybrid you say? Oh joy! As if the world needed another reason to bore me to tears. Honestly it's enough to make one yearn for the sweet release of oblivion... or at least a stiff martini.

A 2.5 Liter Engine? How Utterly Pedestrian!

They're keeping the 2.5 liter four cylinder engine mind you but slapping on 'hybrid technologies' like batteries and electric motors. It's like putting lipstick on a pig isn't it? Still a pig just slightly more… efficient. I’d rather strap a rocket to my tricycle thank you very much.

The Prius Did It! What a Win for the Ugly Ducklings

Apparently Toyota's been pushing this hybrid nonsense since the late 90s with the Prius. The Prius? That hideous thing? Well good for them. It's like watching a particularly dull chess match between two snails but hey at least someone's winning am I right?

Sales are Up! Oh Blow It All!

Sales of the RAV4 are up nearly 10% and hybrids are doing even better. Clearly the world has lost its collective mind. Soon we will all be driving electric cars. It's all part of their elaborate scheme to make me lose my empire I just know it.

Trump's Tariffs and all the Rest

And don't even get me started on those tariffs! Honestly Trump could ruin a wet dream! All the cars get imported from Canada and Japan and it's all very complicated and dull. I think I need a nap.

Better Than the F 150? I'd Like to See That!

Mark Templin claims this new RAV4 will be better than the Ford F 150. Honestly the audacity! Next they will be claiming that Brian can read Kierkegaard. One can dream I suppose and try to take over the world while they are at it.