Nissan's Evil Plan To Dominate America! Will Austin Powers Stop Them?

One Million Vehicles! Muahahaha!

So Nissan thinks it can "max out" production in America eh? Christian Meunier the new Americas leader wants to turn Smyrna Tennessee into a… powerhouse! Apparently this Trump fella's tariffs are "accelerating" things. Good! More chaos more opportunity for… PROFIT! One million vehicles that's almost enough to take over a small island! Wait no it IS enough right Mini Me?

Smyrna Tennessee: My New Volcano Lair?

This Smyrna facility… 6 million square feet! That's bigger than my lair in the volcano… almost. They can pump out 640,000 vehicles a year? I'm going to need to invest in this operation. Imagine: Nissan cars painted black with laser beams! I could call it… the "Evilmobile"! Yes! But not Austin's Evilmobile mine.

Tariffs: The Shark With Frickin' Laser Beams Attached To Their Heads

These tariffs… they're like sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads. I hate them! No wait I love them! No I hate them. Depends on who they hurt I suppose. Meunier is worried about tariffs on auto parts? He should be! That's like… taking away my mojo! Or my cat Mr. Bigglesworth before the cryogenic freeze! Cruel!

Mexico: Not So Much An Evil Plan

They also make cars in Mexico you say? And export them? Dr. Evil is not thrilled! I thought we were taking over America not… engaging in free trade! Free trade is for hippies. But maybe… maybe I can use this. A secret fleet of Nissans disguised as… ordinary cars! We'll infiltrate America and… demand one million dollars! Or maybe one *billion* dollars. Inflation you know!

Hybrids and Infinitis: My New Henchmen!

Hybrids? Infiniti models? These sound like fancy names for my new henchmen! Number Two start working on codenames. We need a villain for the ages! I will call one of my new henchmen Hybrid he will be the brawn and I will call the other one Infiniti he will be the brains. He can be my Number Two instead.

Turning it Around Austin Powers Style!

So Nissan is "turning it around" despite the tariffs? Good for them! But if they get *too* successful I might have to… intervene. After all what is world domination without a little competition? Just you wait Nissan. Dr. Evil is watching… and plotting! Muahahahaha!