Say Hello to My Little Friend...ly Robotaxis! Baidu Takes Europe!

First You Get the Money Then You Get the Power...Then You Get the Robotaxis!

Alright listen up you punks. Tony Montana's got the inside scoop. This Chinese company Baidu with their fancy Apollo Go robotaxi thing? They're movin' in on Europe. That's right Europe! They think they can just waltz in with their driverless cars and take over? Well maybe they can. But Tony Montana always keeps an eye on the competition. This ain't Miami but business is business even if it involves freakin' robots!

Say Hello to Switzerland and Turkey

So here's the deal. They're opening shop in Switzerland huh? Land of chocolate and... neutrality? And Turkey? Well somebody’s gotta drive those tourists around right? This source whoever the hell they are is sayin' that these tech nerds are expanding. They’re even tryin’ to keep it hush hush. Like Tony Montana doesn't know what's goin' on. I see everything. I know everything.

Fully Driverless Fully Montana...Almost

These Apollo Go guys they got these taxis that drive themselves. No driver nobody to blame when you get lost! They're already rollin' around in China gettin' paid with subsidized fares. Which means the government’s payin’ for it. Smart. Real smart. If I had the government payin' for my... services... back in the day I'd still be swimmin' in cash. But hey maybe these robotaxis are the future. A future Tony Montana might just invest in…if the price is right.

Dubai Abu Dhabi...and Now Europe? What's Next Mars?

First Dubai Abu Dhabi now Switzerland and Turkey? These guys are movin' faster than I used to move...well you know. They're even testin' the waters in Hong Kong. Next thing you know they'll be on Mars! I gotta say this is some impressive stuff. But don't get cocky Baidu. This world is mine! Well not *mine* mine...but you get the point.

Testing Testing...Is This Thing On?

These regulators in China they let these robotaxis go full on autonomous after a bunch of tests. First they got drivers then they take 'em out. It's like trainin' a goddamn parrot. But hey if it keeps the streets safe...or safer...I guess it's alright. I always believed in safety…of my investments you hear?

Pony.AI and Uber: Competition Breeds Opportunity

So this Pony.AI another bunch of tech weirdos they teamed up with Uber. Uber! They're planning to get their robotaxis on that platform and hit up the Middle East. These guys are hungry just like I was. But remember what I always say: "In this country you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money you get the power. Then when you get the power then you get the women." And maybe just maybe you get a robotaxi empire.