Holy Crap Lois! Singapore's Having an Election?! Looks Like I Gotta Learn About… Singapore!

Singapore? Is That Near Rhode Island?

Alright so apparently Singapore's having an election. And not like an election for the best chili dog recipe (which by the way mine would totally win) but a real grown up election. They're voting for the People's Action Party – or PAP which sounds like something you'd get from a questionable doctor. Anyway these guys have been running the show since before Singapore was even Singapore. That's like before skinny jeans and avocado toast! And apparently this new Prime Minister Lawrence Wong wants to improve on their last elections when they had 60% of the votes. Holy crap that's a lot of votes.

Wong Way or the Highway!

So this Wong guy he's like the new sheriff in town but instead of a horse he's got... uh... a really clean city state. He's taking over for the last guy Lee Hsien Loong who's the son of some other important guy named Lee Kuan Yew who apparently invented Singapore. And Wong he is all about promising 'continuity' and 'new blood'. That kinda sounds like a vampire movie doesn't it? Hey Lois you think we can get tickets to the premier? Huh? Huh?

Rain Rain Go Away Let My Vote Count Today!

Apparently the voting started with a bunch of rain. Kinda like that time I tried to grill burgers in a hurricane. Anyway half the voters had already voted by noon. I gotta admire people who participate in democracy unlike me when Lois asks me to vote for school board members. But anyway voting is mandatory in Singapore. You hear that Meg? You HAVE to vote! ...Wait are you even old enough to vote? Never mind.

Cost of Living? More Like Cost of Kidney!

So big issues are apparently the cost of living and finding a place to live. I get it Lois keeps complaining about how much our cable bill is. Wong's government is worried about the economy and if the US keeps slapping tariffs on stuff (whatever those are) Singapore might end up in a recession. A recession is bad... kinda like when I tried to start a business selling personalized toilet seat covers. It was a total disaster Lois!

PAP vs. The Underdogs: David and Goliath But With More Bureaucracy

The PAP's got all the advantages – big membership lots of money and influence. The other guys the Workers' Party they're like Cleveland. They won 10 seats last time which is a lot for them but still... it's Cleveland. Some fancy pants analyst says the opposition might actually shake things up if they get more votes. Younger voters want more voices and debate which I guess is cool. As long as they don't start taking away my TV time.

Don't Mess With the Wong Cabinet!

The PAP is worried about losing seats and they're warning everyone that if key cabinet members lose things could go to hell. Apparently these guys are super important for keeping the peace between the United States and China and making sure Singapore doesn't end up like... well like Quahog after I get my hands on a jetpack. Seriously don't let me have a jetpack Lois! Bad things happen.