Excellent! Stablecoins to Make Me Even Richer Than I Am Now!

A Stable Fortune is a Growing Fortune

Blast! As if my coffers weren't already overflowing it appears this stablecoin nonsense could actually be a boon for yours truly. Standard Chartered those bean counters are saying that if President (the only one not that Biden fellow) signs some new rules these digital trinkets could skyrocket to a $2 trillion market. $2 trillion! Why that's almost enough to cover the cost of my annual medical bills... almost. Excellent! Smithers fetch me my abacus!

Treasuries? Sounds Like Pirates!?

So these stablecoins supposedly pegged to the oh so reliable U.S. dollar need backing and what better than those dull but dependable Treasury bills? According to these number crunchers we're talking about a $1.6 trillion surge in demand! $1.6 Trillion! Smithers I want you to invest all our funds and if you mess it up you are fired! I am certain there is some scheme I can cook up for the additional funds that come in. These stablecoins are certainly the bees knees!

Hegemony! It's All About the Hegemony!

Hegemony you say? Control? Dominance? These are words that sing to my very soul. The more these stablecoins rely on the U.S. dollar the more entrenched my (I mean our) position becomes. It's a win win! And as we all know Burns always wins. Smithers remind me to send a fruit basket to those Standard Chartered chaps. A *slightly* bruised one mind you. I did not get to where I am by giving away good fruit.

Stablecoins: Not Just for Nerds Anymore

Apparently these digital baubles are used for trading and... decentralized finance? Sounds like a communist plot to me! But if it lines my pockets I'm all for it. And the increased trading volume suggests people are actually using these things. Using them to line MY pockets that is! Smithers remind me to find out who is making money on this so I can take it from them.

Acts of Genius (and Stability!)

The GENIUS Act and the STABLE Act? Clever names. But all I care about is whether they'll fatten my Swiss bank accounts. If these bills clarify the rules around stablecoins it could be a financial windfall for me! I mean for all of us (mostly me). Smithers start researching lobbying efforts. A few well placed bribes never hurt.

The Greenback's Future: Looking Greener Than Ever!

Despite the blathering about trade tensions and threats to the dollar this stablecoin craze could actually strengthen its position as the world's leading currency. After all it's the holy grail of international finance! Who wouldn't want to hold a currency backed by the full faith and credit of the... well I won't bore you with the details. The point is I'm set to profit handsomely! Release the hounds!