Toss a Coin to Your Witcher... and Maybe an NVIDIA Chip: Banks Gamble on AI!

The Bloody Baron of Banking and the AI Beast

Right then heard some blather from across the pond. Seems the British are getting all hot and bothered about this 'artificial intelligence' nonsense. The Financial Conduct Authority (FCA) sounds like a right bunch of Witch Hunters if you ask me have decided to team up with Nvidia a company that makes chips. Not the kind you eat with goulash mind you but the kind that makes these infernal machines 'think'. They're calling it a 'Supercharged Sandbox'. Sandbox? Sounds like something a striga would bury its victims in.

A Witcher's Guide to Avoiding Scams (and Silver Prices)

Apparently these banks greedy as drowners for coin have been having trouble using this AI without accidentally giving away everyone's secrets or getting scammed by some clever con artist. Privacy concerns they call it. Bah! Back in my day the biggest threat was a griffin trying to make off with your horse. Now it's algorithms. They say these 'large language models' send data to far off lands. Makes you wonder if they're not whispering secrets to some mage in Novigrad... or worse Nilfgaard.

Nvidia's Jensen Huang: More Charming Than a Doppler?

This Nvidia fella Jensen Huang is supposed to be some big shot. Giving keynote speeches and all that. Probably has more coin than Dijkstra. Makes you think doesn't it? All this talk of AI and who's really benefiting? The people or the companies selling the shovels in this gold rush?

HSBC's Generative AI Lead on Success Theater

Heard some bloke named Edward Achtner from HSBC – never trust a bank with more letters than a dragon's hoard – calling it 'success theater'. Fancy words for saying some folks are just showing off. Like a bard singing about a dragon they've never faced. He says these new tools come with 'compliance risks'. Sounds like a fancy way of saying 'this could all go horribly wrong'.

The FCA's Sandbox: More Playtime or a Precaution?

So the FCA is offering this 'Supercharged Sandbox' where banks can play with AI without hopefully summoning a botchling into the financial system. They reckon it'll help firms who 'lack the capabilities'. Which let's be honest is most of them. I've seen peasants with more common sense than some of these bankers.

Wind's Howling and So Are the Regulators

They say this is all about benefiting markets and consumers while supporting economic growth. Sounds like a load of dragon droppings to me. But hey if it keeps the monsters at bay maybe it's worth a try. Just don't expect me to understand it. I'm a Witcher not a bloody economist. Now where's that gwent deck?