Chantal's Howling Gale: Carolinas Brace for a Witch's Brew of Rain and Trouble

A Witcher's Weather Forecast: When the Elements Go Wild

Well damn. Looks like I'm not the only one stirring up trouble these days. Heard about this 'Chantal' witch brewing off the coast. Not the kind I usually hunt mind you. This one deals in wind and water not curses and hexes. Seems this 'tropical storm' – fancy name for a glorified downpour – is heading straight for the Carolinas. They're saying heavy rains potential floods... the usual song and dance when the elements decide to throw a tantrum. Reminds me of that time Yennefer lost her temper during a Gwent game. Chaos pure chaos.

Carolinas in the Crosshairs: Prepare for a Soaking

So this Chantal is apparently packing winds strong enough to blow a striga off its feet. They’re talking about 45 mph which admittedly is less than Roach’s top speed when a ghoul is nipping at her heels. But still enough to make a mess of things. The center of this watery beast is predicted to slither across South Carolina then over to North Carolina by Sunday. 'Strengthening before landfall,' they say. As if things weren't soggy enough. Maybe I should invest in a waterproof griffin saddle...

Rain Rain Go Away: Or How to Survive a Flood (The Witcher Way)

Heavy rain is expected through Monday. Two to four inches with some spots getting soaked with SIX. That’s enough to turn a tavern into a swimming pool and trust me I've seen it happen. Flash flooding is the big worry. Now I've dealt with drowners but those are at least predictable. A flash flood is like a surprise kikimore attack – sudden messy and likely to ruin your best boots. My advice? Find high ground. And maybe learn a few water breathing spells. Just in case. Or find a Witcher.

The Ballad of the Battered Boots and the Soaked Swords

Ah the Carolinas. A place where I've heard the humidity can age a man faster than a striga's curse. Now throw in a tropical storm named Chantal and you've got a recipe for disaster. Or at least a very damp disaster. I do hope those poor sods have stocked up on dry socks and strong spirits. Because if there's one thing I've learned in my long years it's that a good storm can wash away more than just the dirt. It can wash away hope and leave you shivering in the cold of despair. Don't let it.

Prophecies and Predictions: A Dose of Witcher Wisdom

Speaking of prophecies let's see if I can dust off my Witcher senses for a moment. I sense... wetness. And maybe a slight increase in the price of ale. I also foresee a lot of people complaining about their leaky roofs. And children gleefully jumping in puddles. So not all doom and gloom then. Just your average storm doing what storms do. Still keep your wits about you. And maybe learn a few aard signs. You never know when you might need to push a flood away... or blow a drowner back into the depths.

A Developing Story: Keep Your Eyes Peeled and Your Powder Dry

That’s all for now. This 'story' is still developing as they say. So keep an eye on the horizon and your Gwent deck dry. And remember if things get really bad there's always a Witcher for hire. Just try to pay in coin not drowned dead men’s teeth. Those are harder to fence. I swear to Melitele I'm too old for this sh*t.