Tesla's Electric Shock: Musk Stays Put (For Now), Says 'False!' to CEO Replacement Rumors

A Witcher's Grumble About Gnomes and Gossip

Well damn. Another day another rumor mill churned out faster than a Dopplerganger changing faces. This time it's about Tesla. Apparently some scribe at the *Wall Street Journal* decided to pen a tale about Tesla's board lookin' to replace Elon Musk. Says they were whisperin' to executive search firms. Sounds like a tavern brawl after too much ale full of hearsay and exaggerated claims. As I always say 'When in doubt trust your instincts.' And my instincts are tellin' me someone's been drinkin' too much White Gull and listenin' to gossiping gnomes.

Denholm's Swift Strike: 'Absolutely False!'

Tesla's chairwoman Robyn Denholm she wasn't havin' any of it. Like a well aimed crossbow bolt she shot down the rumor on that social media platform 'X'. Said the report was 'absolutely false.' Sounds like somethin' I'd say after someone tries to sell me a griffin egg for a dragon's. She went on about Musk being the CEO and the board believin' in his 'exciting growth plan.' Well alright then. Sounds official enough. Though as I've learned even the most official soundin' proclamations can be as reliable as a noonwraith in broad daylight.

Tesla's Tumble: More Than Just a Witcher's Luck Gone Bad

But hold your horses there's more to this than just refuted rumors. Tesla's been havin' a bit of a tumble. Sales are down profits are plummeting faster than a rock troll after a shot of Zerrikanian Fire. Seems updating those vehicle factories to churn out the new Model Y ain't been smooth sailing. Lower selling prices and incentives ain't helpin' either. Makes ya wonder if Musk is focused on more than just electric cars. Gotta admit I've seen less chaos during a royal wedding in Cintra.

Musk's Government Gig: A Detraction or a Distraction?

And what's this I hear about Musk plannin' to spend 'a day or two per week' runnin' some 'Department of Government Efficiency'? Sounds about as efficient as a Leshen tryin' to knit a sweater. Musk himself admitted that his involvement with politics might be hurtin' Tesla's stock. Smart man seein' the obvious at least. Though try explainin' that to a troll invested in shares. You might as well be shoutin' in Elvish.

The Numbers Don't Lie: Even to a Witcher

The numbers paint a grim picture. Revenue down 9% year on year. Automotive segment even worse down 20%. Net income lookin' like a drowners dinner a 71% plunge. Since the start of the year shares have plummeted over 30%. You don't need to be a sorceress to see that somethin's rotten in the state of...well Tesla. Even a Witcher like myself can understand that coin doesn't grow on trees. Or in this case it doesn't materialize from thin air in a charging station.

Tesla's Future: A Witcher's Guess is as Good as Any Analyst's

So what's the future hold for Tesla? Is it just a temporary dip or somethin' more sinister? Honestly your guess is as good as mine. And probably as good as any analyst's too. One thing's for sure: this Witcher won't be investin' any coin until things settle down. I've got monsters to slay contracts to fulfill and way too much Gwent to play. And I sure as hell don't have time to chase after every flicker in the stock market like it's a will o' the wisp in a swamp.