Nissan's Grand Reductions: When Roach Gets More Stable Employment

A Witcher's Lament: Another Fine Mess

Hmm looks like the world's gone mad again. Heard about Nissan right? Slashing another 10,000 jobs bringing the grand total to a delightful 20,000 souls out on their arses. That's 15% of their workforce gone. Makes you wonder if they consulted a djinn for these solutions. Seems about as effective as asking a drowners' opinions on bath time. Damn they are struggling aren't they? A 700 billion yen loss? That's enough coin to make even Dijkstra blush.

The US and China: A Witcher's Contract Gone Sour

Apparently the Yanks and the Chinese aren't buying what Nissan's selling. Lack of hybrids in the US? Sounds like someone forgot to use their Witcher senses. And in China? Sales are sliding faster than a greased up goblin. They're planning to launch ten new vehicles? Ten! Sounds like a contract for a silver sword but with wheels. Medallion's humming... feels like trouble.

Restructuring: More Like Re arranging Deck Chairs on the Titanic

They were already planning to slash 9,000 jobs and reduce capacity by 20%. Well add another ten thousand. Restructuring they call it. Sounds more like a monster contract than a business plan. These corporates make me laugh with all their nonsense words. I say just pay the workers.

Prophecies and Profit: The Same Bloody Mess

Remember when I said "Evil is evil lesser greater middling… Makes no difference." well loss is loss. Whether it's 500 or 700 billion yen. This financial year has been rough on Nissan. Cutting profit outlook four times? Should've consulted a Doppler. At least they can imitate a profitable company for a while. Roach knows more about stability than them right now.

The Witcher's Advice: Just Say Yen!

So what's a Witcher to do? Well I'd say: less fancy talk more innovation. Maybe get a dwarf involved? Those fellas know their engines. And for the love of Melitele invest in those hybrids! Nobody wants to drive a wheezing cart in this day and age! Though I shouldnt complain too much about carts.

Parting Wisdom: Now Where's My Payment?

Another day another disaster. At least I get paid for dealing with drowners and griffins. These Nissan executives? Probably get a bonus for screwing things up. The world's gone to the dogs. Now where's my Gwent deck and a pint of ale? Need something to take the edge off. Oh and don't forget Roach's oats.