Eric Trump Nukes the Banking System: 'Time to Chew Bubblegum and Kick Some Banks!'

Shake it Baby! Eric Trump Sounds the Alarm

Alright you primitive screwheads listen up! Eric Trump the guy who knows a thing or two about building empires (just like me!) is calling out the banking system. According to him these dinosaurs are about to go extinct unless they get with the times. He was yapping to CNBC in Dubai about how the UAE is turning into a crypto haven. 'There's nothing that can be done on blockchain that can't be done better than the way that the current financial institutions are working. SWIFT is an absolute disaster,' he said. Disaster? Tell me about it! I've seen more efficient systems run by alien scum!

Antiquated Banking? More Like 'Come Get Some!'

Eric's not holding back folks. He's calling the traditional banking system 'antiquated.' And he's right! These guys are slower than a pig in mud. Meanwhile I'm over here blowing up alien hordes and saving the planet before breakfast. He mentioned that our banking system favors the ultra wealthy! That is complete bull! He says if banks don't watch out they'll be gone in a decade. Extinct? Good riddance. Maybe then I can finally get a decent loan for my next shotgun upgrade.

Crypto: The Future is Now and I'm All In!

This crypto thing? It's like steroids for your wallet. Eric's all about decentralized finance (DeFi) where you can send money wallet to wallet instantly without those pesky bank fees. 'You can open up a DeFi app right now you can open up any cryptocurrency app and you can send money wallet to wallet instantaneously without the expense without the variability' of banks Eric Trump said. Meanwhile JP Morgan and Goldman Sachs are scrambling to get in on the action. Smart move fellas. But remember Duke Nukem was here first!

No One Steals Our Freedom Especially Not Big Banks

Eric said 'Our banking system favors the ultra wealthy,' and that the system has been weaponized against most people in our country. That's it! Time to kick ass and chew bubblegum! The Trump administration is going full throttle on crypto. President Trump and Melania are even launching their own meme coins. Now that's what I call a power move. It is never too late to start a crypto empire!

Trump Family's Crypto Crusade: A New World Order?

The Trumps aren't just talking the talk; they're walking the walk. They're behind World Liberty Financial launching stablecoins and even starting a bitcoin mining company called American Bitcoin. They're practically building a new financial world order. These guys are taking a page right out of my book and I am loving it!

Hail to the King Baby!

The UAE is becoming the go to spot for crypto investors and startups. And Eric's praising the relationships with Gulf leaders. Trump will be visiting the Gulf region from May 13 to 16 stopping in the UAE Saudi Arabia and Qatar. That will be the first visit by a U.S. president since Bush in 2008. So banks take note: the future is here and it's powered by crypto. If you don't adapt you're gonna end up like those aliens: a stain on my boot. Now if you'll excuse me I've got some bubblegum to chew and some banks to kick!