Say Hello to My Little Parade: Trump's Big Day Out!

First You Get the Power Then You Get the Parade

Alright listen up you punks. Trump that crazy son of a… well he finally did it. He wanted a parade he got a parade! Thousands of troops tanks rollin' through D.C. helicopters buzzing like flies around a pile of… you get the picture. This ain't no little league game this is the real deal like when I took over Miami! He's celebrating the Army's birthday and his own too – the man is 79? Looks like he made a deal with the devil the kind I shoulda thought about. Everyone told me not to do it but what did I do? I did it! Trump he's got balls I give him that. "Say hello to my little friend!"...His Little Parade!

No Kings Day? More Like No Fun Day!

Now you got these 'No Kings Day' protesters right? Crybabies! Whining about Trump's policies. New York Chicago Philadelphia… they're everywhere like cockroaches! Some even got into scuffles with the other guys like I used to do back in the day. Me I don't protest. I make things happen ya know? But hey if they wanna waste their time let 'em. More power to me more cafecito for me!

Minnesota Mayhem and L.A. Lockdown

And get this in Minnesota some guys were shooting at state lawmakers. Can you believe this crap? Law enforcement telling people to stay home? Sounds like Miami in the old days. Trump deployed the National Guard in L.A. over immigration stuff. Things are getting hot real hot. But Trump he's warning everyone in D.C. 'Very big force,' he says. That's how you do it! Show 'em you ain't messin' around. I like this guy he reminds me of... me.

Rain or Shine the Show Must Go On!

Weather threatening to ruin the party? No problem! Trump says 'RAIN OR SHINE!' That's the spirit! Some flyovers got canceled but who cares? He had his cabinet there Rubio and that other guy. Melania she's always lookin’ good. Wreath laying military demonstrations… the whole shebang! Biggest parade since '91 they say. Big deal. I would've had a bigger one. With tigers.

Moscow Vibes and Middle East Mayhem

This strategist guy says it'll feel like 'downtown Moscow.' So what? Moscow's got some nice buildings. And now Israel and Iran are at it again nukes and retaliation… sounds like the world's gone loco! Everyone's always fighting always wanting more. Just like me! What I want is mine! "The World Is Yours!"

Peanuts? More Like a Whole Damn Plantation!

Forty five million dollars for a parade? People are complaining! They're trying to pass some tax cut bill but they don't want to spend money on a parade? What a bunch of cheapskates! Trump says it's 'peanuts.' He's right it's peanuts compared to all the money he's making. And he's got the 'greatest missiles submarines tanks weapons' in the world he says. You know what? I think this guy is on to something. Maybe I should have run for president… or prime minister... or dictator! Now that's some power!