Say Hello to My Little Tariffs! Tech Stocks Get Scarface'd by Trump!

The World is Mine... Or is it?

Listen up you punks! Tony Montana here reporting live from my freakin' mansion. I'm watchin' this market go loco! Trump that crazy son of a... well he's slapped these tariffs on everyone like givin' 'em a face full of my 'little friend!' Apple Nvidia all those big shots are bleedin' cash. It's like a freakin' bloodbath out there!

Apple's Rotten to the Core

Apple the kings of the hill they got knocked down hard eh? Down nine percent! Nine freakin' percent! That's like when I lost Manny... a real kick in the huevos. They make their stuff in China and now Trump's gonna make 'em pay. That's what I call a 'bad guy' move even for him!

Nasdaq Gets the Chainsaw Treatment

The Nasdaq that tech playground took a freakin' dive. Down six percent! It's the worst it's been in years. Now they know what it's like to get hit with a baseball bat eh? All these fancy tech companies cryin' like babies. 'Boo hoo the market's down!' Welcome to the real world eh?

Semiconductors Screaming for Mercy

The semiconductor guys they’re gettin’ it even worse! Marvell Broadcom Micron—all goin' down like flies. It's like I walked into their office and yelled 'You wanna play rough? Okay! I show you!' And Micron oh that's my fav they're down 16%!

Trump Says 'Trust Me'

So Trump is out there flapping his gums sayin' it's an 'economic declaration of independence.' Sounds like somethin' I'd say before I start blastin' everyone eh? But he applauds Apple says they're investing in the U.S. Five hundred billion clams! Maybe they bought him off. Everybody has a price no?

China's Pissed So is Tony!

China's screamin' bloody murder sayin' Trump better 'immediately cancel' these tariffs. They’re gonna fight back. A trade war...that's what you get when you think you can run the world! Makes me miss the good ol' days when all I had to worry about was the DEA and my itchy trigger finger. Now the whole world is going crazy! Maybe I should move to Switzerland...