Hulk Smash Alibaba's Earnings! Puny Numbers Make Hulk ANGRY!

Hulk Don't Like Red Numbers!

Hulk read 'bout Alibaba. They say Alibaba no make enough money! Revenue less than everyone think like puny Banner's muscles! They say '236.5 billion Chinese yuan ($32.6 Billion),' but people want '237.2 billion yuan'! Hulk smash expectations! But Alibaba... Alibaba just disappoint. Hulk thought money tree grow bigger! Hulk ANGRY!

Little Green Men in China!

They say Alibaba make MORE money than last year. 7% MORE! Like Hulk get angrier every minute! But still not enough. Hulk think they need more gamma radiation! And net income is up a lot... like 279%! But they got rid of some friends (subsidiaries) so some things went down. Hulk thinks this is like when Banner tries to control Hulk. BIG MISTAKE!

Trade War Make Hulk See Red (and Alibaba Blue)!

Hulk hear whispers of trade war between Washington and Beijing. Sounds like Hulk vs. Abomination! Tariffs flying everywhere! Makes Hulk want to SMASH! They agreed to stop fighting for now (suspend tariffs) but damage is done. This make consumers sad and not want to spend money on Alibaba's website. Hulk wants happy consumers!

Taobao and Tmall: Hulk Sized Sales?

Taobao and Tmall supposed to be big moneymakers like Hulk's muscles! They say revenue up 9%! That's like Hulk smashing with EXTRA power! They even make deal with Rednote like Instagram so people can buy things easier. Good! Hulk like easy! But still not enough to make everyone happy.

Alibaba Cloud Try To Reach The Sky!

Alibaba has cloud that's called something and is making money. Hulk knows clouds can be very scary... But this cloud help people with computers. They say it grows 18%! Because more people use computer clouds and AI help. Cloud get big! Just like Hulk!

AI: Is This The Next Hulk?

Everyone talking 'bout AI like new shiny toy! Alibaba try to make AI smart like Banner! They got Qwen 3! But others have AI too like DeepSeek! They all compete like Hulk fight Thor! Alibaba say AI make 'triple digit growth!' But Hulk don't know what that mean! Hulk smash numbers not count them! They have confidence and want AI to make even more money next time maybe they will make as much as HULK!