Hulk SMASH Target's WOKE Blunders! Retailer Turns Green with Envy as Profits SHRINK!

Target TRY to be Inclusive Hulk Just Wants to SMASH!

Hulk hear puny humans talking 'bout Target. Target try be 'woke,' but Hulk think Target just confused! They roll back DEI – what dat even MEAN? – and now everyone ANGRY! Boycotts happening less people go Target. Hulk not understand all dis 'equity' talk but Hulk understand ANGRY! When Hulk angry things BREAK! Maybe Target break too? Target think they 'nimble' like little spider but Amazon HUGE like Hulk! Amazon eat Target for breakfast! Hulk like breakfast!

Hulk's INVENTORY of RAGE is HIGH!

Target got too much stuff! Too much inventory! Like Hulk got too much gamma radiation! Not good! They discount things to get rid of stuff like Hulk discount puny Banner's opinion! Now they got DEI problem like icing on a big stinky corporate cake! Telsey guy say Target messed up! Hulk say "Target shoulda asked Hulk! Hulk know how to SMASH problems!"

Walmart and Costco Get BIGGER Target Get...SMALLER!

Hulk see customers go to Walmart and Costco. They buy MORE! Target customers still spend money but they spread it around like Hulk spread… EVERYTHING! Walmart and Costco laugh at Target. Hulk laugh too! HA! Target lose market share! That mean they LOSING! Hulk NEVER lose! Except to maybe… NEVER MIND!

Locking Up Products? Is Target Afraid Hulk Will Steal?

Target lock up products! Why Target do that? Target think Hulk gonna steal? Hulk only steal… okay maybe Hulk steal ONE time! But Hulk was HUNGRY! Anyway locking up stuff make customers ANGRY! No new partnerships? Old partnerships BORING! Target need Hulk partnership! Hulk promote smashing action figures! Make MILLIONS!

Staff Shortages?! Hulk Volunteer!

Target can't find enough puny humans to work! Hulk volunteer! Hulk carry ALL the boxes! Hulk be the BEST greeter! Hulk SMASH bad guys who try to steal! But Hulk need BIG paycheck! And lots of burritos! Target probably not afford Hulk. Target probably go bankrupt! Hulk laugh again! HA HA HA!

Target Try to Be Nimble? Hulk Say: SMASH!

Target say they will be 'nimble' and 'generate profitable growth.' Hulk say they need to stop talking and start SMASHING the competition! They say they listen to consumers. Hulk is consumer! Hulk say Target needs MORE GREEN! And LESS WOKE! Hulk leave now. Hulk got anger management class. Maybe Target should take one too!