Tariffs are Screwing Everything Up Morty! Even Space Travel Is Gonna Cost More Now!

Wubba Lubba Dub Dub! The Economy's Screwed!

Alright Morty listen up. Your grandpa Rick the smartest man in the universe is here to drop some truth bombs. So these…*burp*…these *moronic* tariffs that orange guy slapped on everything are hitting RTX and GE Aerospace hard. We're talking about over a *billion* dollars Morty! A BILLION! You know what you could buy with that? A portal gun that actually works for starters. And maybe some Szechuan sauce that's not from McDonald's back in '98.

RTX: Getting Rekt by Taxes

So RTX these guys building space lasers or whatever they're saying tariffs will cost them 850 million this year. Morty that's real money! That's like enough to…*burp*…to almost pay for my alcoholism for a few *centuries*! And get this they're trying to 'mitigate' the damage. What does that even mean? Probably just passing the cost onto you you little consumer sheep!

GE Aerospace: Trying to Not Get Schwifty

And GE Aerospace? They're all like 'Oh we'll just cut costs and raise prices!' Classic. These corporate weasels always do the same thing. It's like they're stuck in a feedback loop of greed. Apparently their CEO met with the orange guy. Probably trying to butter him up so they can keep building engines and polluting the *entire universe*. 'Trade surplus' they called it. More like 'trade surplus of bullsh*t'!

Duty Free? More Like Duty Please!

These industries have been living the high life for decades enjoying duty free trade. Now they're whining. Boo hoo. Maybe they should have invested in some reality altering technology like I have. Then they wouldn't have to worry about…*burp*…stupid human economics! It's a shift for an industry Morty get used to it! Embrace the chaos!

Boeing's About to Crash (Probably)

Boeing a major customer of RTX and GE will announce results tomorrow. I'm betting they'll blame everything on tariffs too. It's the perfect scapegoat! Everyone loves to hate tariffs. It's like blaming the Meeseeks box for your failing marriage. Easy and doesn't require any actual introspection Morty!

Nobody Knows What's Gonna Happen!

United Airlines is already talking about cutting capacity because of 'softer demand'. And GE's CEO is all like 'There is uncertainty'. No *sh*t Sherlock! There's always uncertainty! That's what makes life interesting Morty! Well interesting and completely terrifying. Nobody knows how this is gonna play out. Which frankly is the most predictable outcome of all. Wubba Lubba Dub Dub!