Trump's 'One Big, Beautiful Bill': Is It Gonna Be as Good as a Giant Chicken Fight?

Trump's Throwin' a Party!

Alright so Trump's got this 'One Big Beautiful Bill' thing he's pushin'. Sounds kinda like when I tried to sell that giant inflatable chicken I won at the carnival. Turns out nobody wanted it except Mort Goldman and that's saying something. Anyway Trump had a bunch of 'everyday Americans' at the White House like truck drivers and firefighters. No word on whether they got free beer but I bet Quagmire was hoping to see some flight attendants! Giggity.

No Tax on Tips? Hot Diggity!

This Maliki Krieski lady a DoorDash driver is all excited about not paying taxes on her tips. Good for her! Me? I'm always tryin' to figure out how to 'forget' to report my winnings from those scratch off tickets. Lois always yells at me. 'Peter you can't just claim you found a hundred dollars under the couch every week!' But hey a guy's gotta dream right?

The Senate: More Annoying Than a Giant Chicken

So Trump's yellin' at the Senate to 'GET THE DEAL DONE THIS WEEK!' Sounds like me when I'm ordering a beer and the bartender's takin' forever. But these Senate guys are worried about deficits. Deficits! Sounds like a fancy word for 'no more beer money'. And that parliamentarian sounds like a bird apparently shot down some parts of the bill. Probably a liberal bird just sayin.

Uh Oh House Re Vote? This Sounds Complicated!

If the Senate changes anything the House has to vote again. It's like when you're trying to explain a joke to Brian and you have to go back and explain all the setup again. By the time you're done nobody's laughing and you just want to go watch TV and eat a bucket of chicken. Which come to think of it sounds pretty good right now.

Will This Bill Actually Do Anything?

Honestly I dunno if this bill is gonna be any good. Politics are like explaining the plot of 'Back to the Future' to Stewie – complicated and probably involving time travel paradoxes. I'm just hoping it means more money for beer and maybe a new TV. Because let's face it my old one's got that weird green line and it's kinda distracting when you're trying to watch 'Spaceballs'.

Quagmire's Take on the New Bill?

Giggity Giggity Giggity lets hope this means more money for everyone especially the ladies. Also I heard something about airline jobs? Well lets just say someone is going to be busy and if you catch my drift you should catch a flight. Giggity!