Recession is Coming! Even the Bloody Bankers are Saying It!

A Witcher's Worry: More Monsters or Empty Coffers?

Hmph another day another disaster brewing. This time it's not a griffin or a leshen but a recession. Jamie Dimon the big cheese over at JPMorgan Chase is flapping his gums about how the US economy is likely to go belly up thanks to those blasted tariffs of Trump's. Looks like folks are gonna have less coin for witcher contracts. Might have to start taking payment in Gwent cards. Roach will be thrilled...

The Dragon's Gold: A Tale of Tit for Tat Tariffs

Seems the US and China are playing a game of 'who can slap the biggest tariff on whom.' China's threatening an 84% tariff on all US goods. That's like Yennefer charging 84% more for a single potion! The Dow futures are plummeting faster than a noonwraith in sunlight and the 10 year Treasury yields are spiking like a noonwraith in sunlight. Makes a witcher want to drown his sorrows in a flagon of ale.

Dimon's Dismal Diagnosis: A Witcher's Intuition Confirmed?

This Dimon fellow reckons the markets aren't always right but this time they're spot on. Uncertainty is the name of the game and that's bad news for everyone. Makes me wonder if I should invest in some silver ore. Never know when you'll need to slay a few specters... or you know survive a financial collapse.

From Tariff Fanboy to Worried Wall Street Wolf

Here's the kicker: Dimon used to be all for these tariffs. Said people should 'get over it' and that a little inflation was worth it for national security. Now he's singing a different tune urging the US to 'negotiate some trade deals.' Sounds like someone’s changed their tune faster than Dandelion changes his lute strings.

Advice from a Financial Sorcerer: Take a Deep Breath… and Negotiate!

Dimon's advice? 'Take a deep breath negotiate some trade deals.' Sounds simple enough but knowing politicians they'll probably find a way to muck it up worse than a barghest in a swamp. As for me I think I'll stick to slaying monsters. At least they're predictable.

The Queen's Gambit: Confirming a Watchdog

On the side Dimon’s pushing for Michelle Bowman to be confirmed as vice chair for supervision. Apparently she's supposed to keep an eye on all the banking shenanigans. Good luck to her she will need it. Seems like a thankless job. Like trying to teach a rock troll manners.