Damn You, Dopplergangers! Uber Unleashes Driverless Cabs in London

A Witcher's Work is Never Done...Especially When It Involves Machines

So I heard a tale – louder than a noonwraith in a bog – about Uber teaming up with Wayve to unleash 'self driving' carriages in London. Seems they want to replace honest drivers with soulless machines. As if the world needed more things trying to kill you without warning. Automation they call it. I call it a pain in the arse. Reminds me of that djinn I had to deal with in Rinde. Always granting wishes with a twist leaving everyone worse off than before. What now are we supposed to trust these metal contraptions to not drive us straight into a griffin's nest? This is madness!

Level 4? Sounds Like a Witcher's Potion Recipe

Apparently this is 'Level 4' autonomous driving. Sounds like one of Triss's potion ingredients. 'Add two sprigs of fool's parsley a pinch of dragon's teeth and stir counterclockwise until Level 4.' This means no safety driver. Just you the cold steel of a machine and the chaotic streets of London. Reminds me of the Wild Hunt – relentless unstoppable and utterly devoid of common sense. Mark my words someone's going to end up needing a Witcher. Probably to exorcise a bloody poltergeist from the navigation system.

Robotaxis: Are They Worse Than Ghouls?

San Francisco's already infested with these 'robotaxis,' like rotfiends in a graveyard. Now London's next. Uber's president this Andrew MacDonald claims it will make autonomy 'safe and reliable'. Safe? Reliable? Have they met the average London driver? Or a Dopplerganger pretending to be one? This is just an excuse to save a few crowns. I bet these automatons won't even stop for a Witcher needing a lift to the nearest monster nest. Bloody typical.

The AI Driver: More Dangerous Than a Nekker in a Sandbox?

Wayve's CEO Alex Kendall boasts about their 'AI Driver technology'. AI eh? Sounds like another way to say 'something that will inevitably go wrong at the worst possible moment'. It's all software and algorithms learning on the fly. Last time I saw something 'learning on the fly,' it was a fledgling leshen trying to imitate my swordplay. Didn't end well for the leshen. Or the nearby village for that matter.

The UK's 'Accelerated Framework': A Trap for the Unwary?

The UK's got some 'accelerated framework' that's allowing this madness. Government meddling as usual. Politicians always eager to stick their noses where they don't belong. Reminds me of those Nilfgaardian bureaucrats always wanting to regulate the number of hairs on Roach's tail. Just leads to more paperwork and headaches. They say they'll work with Transport for London on approvals. Good luck with that. Bureaucracy is a monster of its own kind.

So Where's My Contract?

Backed by SoftBank this Wayve mob thinks they've got all the answers. But I've seen enough to know that shiny technology is no match for a well placed silver sword. This whole thing stinks of trouble. So naturally I'll be watching. Waiting. Because when these metal beasts inevitably malfunction and start terrorizing the populace who are they gonna call? Ghostbusters? Nah they'll need a Witcher. Now where's my contract? And some Gwent cards this could take a while.