Hail to the King, Baby! Supreme Court Slaps Down Trump's Deportation Scheme

Come Get Some: Supreme Court's Got Some Sense

Alright you primitive screwheads listen up! The Supreme Court in a move that's surprisingly less dumb than usual just smacked down Trump's attempt to fast track the deportation of some Venezuelan dudes under the Alien Enemies Act. Seems they thought giving a guy 24 hours to pack his bags and say goodbye wasn't exactly 'fair game'. I mean even I get more prep time before blowing up an alien mothership! And I always come prepared. This whole thing just reeks of 'hail to the king baby,' but in reverse.

Groovy But Not Fast Enough

The court in its infinite wisdom decided that these guys deserve a little more than a 'see ya later wouldn't wanna be ya' before getting booted back to Venezuela. They're saying the Trump administration didn't give 'em enough time or info to fight their case. You know basic stuff like 'innocent until proven guilty' – something even I Duke Nukem the king of kicking alien ass respects. But let’s not get too excited the court did mention the government could still deport them under other authorities. As I always say 'I’m here to kick ass and chew bubblegum… and I’m all outta gum.' Looks like someone still has some ass to kick.

Trump's Tantrum: 'What an Asshole!'

Of course Trump threw a hissy fit on Truth Social whining that the court is preventing him from “getting criminals out of our country!” He's blaming 'Sleepy Joe' for letting 'MILLIONS of Criminal Aliens' into the country. Someone get this guy a juice box and a nap! The court even pointed out that the government screwed up and accidentally deported one of these guys to a prison in El Salvador! Talk about a 'come get some' moment gone wrong. The guy’s probably thinking 'damn I’m good!'

Not a Judgment Day...Yet

Now hold your horses folks. The Supreme Court didn't rule on whether the Alien Enemies Act was used correctly. They just said these guys deserved a little more notice. It’s like giving an alien a heads up before blowing him to smithereens – a courtesy really. And that’s why ladies and gentlemen the AEA cases should be sorted out expeditiously. If the court knows its lines the ruling will conclude in no time.

Alito and Thomas: Party Poopers

Of course Alito and Thomas had to be the party poopers questioning whether these guys were in 'imminent danger of removal' and whining about the District Court's 'inaction.' Guess some people just love the smell of burning due process in the morning. It smells like…victory!

Hail to the King: Temporary Reprieve!

So there you have it. A temporary win for those Venezuelan nationals a tantrum from Trump and a reminder that even the Supreme Court can occasionally get things right. But don't worry there's plenty more ass kicking to be done. The case is heading back to the lower courts so stay tuned. As I always say 'I’m back baby!' And you know what that means.