Defense Stocks Go Brrrrr: Europe's New Favorite Meme?

Defense Stocks? More Like DeFence Am I Right?

Alright alright alright settle down you beautiful baldies. Asmongold here fresh off another 16 hour stream and ready to break down what's REALLY going on with these European defense stocks. Apparently everyone's suddenly decided they need to be strapped – and I don't just mean with the latest Gucci belt. We're talking tanks missiles the whole shebang. So yeah defense stocks? They're going BRRRRRR. Like my hairline they're receding... but in the opposite direction you know? Upwards! To the moon!

Rare Earths: The New Toilet Paper Crisis?

But here's the catch folks. Turns out building all this fancy hardware requires rare earth minerals. And wouldn't you know it Europe gets almost 90% of its yttrium – that's the stuff they use to make fighter jets that go REEEEE – from China. It's like the toilet paper crisis all over again except instead of wiping your butt you're wiping... the floor with potential invaders? I don't know man I'm tired. The point is if China decides to play hardball we could be looking at some serious delays. No jets for you! Come back one year!

Is This the Peak? Or Just the Pre Peak Peak?

So is this the top? Have we already reached peak defense stock mania? Some analysts are saying 'Nah there's still room to grow,' pointing to rising NATO budgets and renewed national rearmament efforts. Others are a bit more cautious worried about those pesky rare earth mineral shortages. It's like trying to decide whether to pull for more gacha rolls – are you gonna get that sweet legendary or just another pile of garbage? Gamble responsibly kids.

The Thales CEO Has Spoken!

Patrice Caine the big cheese over at Thales (their stock is up 80% this year alone) is trying to play it cool. He says the supply chain issues are "much lower down" and not impacting them directly...yet. It's like when you're standing in the poop river and haven't been hit by the wave yet. Sure buddy...sure.

5% of GDP on Defense? Trump Was Right All Along?

Deutsche Bank is sounding the alarm too. They're saying these stocks are already pricing in higher spending and they don't see much more upside. Apparently NATO might propose members spend 5% of their GDP on defense – a notion touted by everyone's favorite orange man Donald Trump. You know the guy who probably thinks a missile defense system is just a really big wall. Is it possible...dare I say it...was Trump right about something? Unbelievable!

To the Moon! (Maybe)

So what's the verdict? Are defense stocks a worthwhile investment? Honestly who the hell knows. It's like trying to predict what Blizzard's going to do next. Maybe they'll announce Diablo 4 immortal. One thing is certain: with rising global tensions the defense sector is probably going to be in the spotlight for a while. Just don't go yoloing your life savings into it okay? Remember kids the best defense is a good offense...and a healthy dose of skepticism. Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna go watch some more My Little Pony. For research purposes of course.