Get Schwifty With Tariffs! Trump's Movie Tax Could Make Your Head Explode (In a Bad Way)

Wubba Lubba Dub Dub My Stocks Are Screwed!

Alright Morty gather 'round. Grandpa Rick's gotta break down this latest interdimensional clusterf*ck. So apparently this… *burp*… this Trump guy he's proposing a 100% tariff on movies made outside the US. A hundred percent Morty! That's like worse than finding out your parents are doing it! Stocks are plummeting faster than I can chug a bottle of my special sauce. Netflix Disney the whole damn lot – they're all feeling the heat. Guess the government has nothing better to do than screw with entertainment.

National Security? More Like National Bullsh*t!

He’s calling this tax incentive a national security threat? Seriously? It's not like the citadel is going to be taking over by Disney Movies Morty. It's just a bunch of suits trying to squeeze every last drop of green out of this dying planet. 'Oh no Morty Hollywood’s filming in Canada! The horror! The existential dread!' Give me a break. This is less about national security and more about… *burp*… control. He’s just trying to Make America Great Again by ruining everyone's fun. Pure unadulterated garbage Morty.

Show Me What You Got! (aka How's This Even Work?)

The real question Morty is how the hell are they gonna enforce this crap? Are they gonna tax the actual film? Are they gonna tax the feelings we get when we watch it? It's like taxing ideas Morty! Who knows what part of the production they will hit? It is like trying to catch farts in a jar! Good luck with that genius. This whole thing is about as clear as mud... interdimensional mud that is!

Nobody Exists on Purpose Nobody Belongs Anywhere Everybody's Gonna Die...and Pay More For Movies!

Let's get real Morty. Studios film overseas for two reasons: Money and pretty backgrounds. Cheaper labor and tax breaks Morty! It's all about the benjamins. And now Trump wants to mess with that? He is really not going to like what comes next. These studios are gonna be bending over backward to kiss his…uh never mind Morty. The point is prepare to pay more for your favorite flicks or deal with watching movies that are really REALLY boring and filmed entirely in Burbank. Choice is yours Morty!

China's Already Closed The Door Time To Jump Dimensions!

And guess what Morty? China's already given Hollywood the middle finger. They don't want our movies. Now with this tariff nonsense other countries might retaliate. This means less money for Hollywood less content for us and more political squabbling than you can shake a Plumbus at. I’d say it’s time to hop into another dimension Morty. One where movies are free and the beer flows like a river of…well you get the idea.

Grass... Tastes Bad!

So what's the takeaway here Morty? The world is a messed up place politicians are idiots and capitalism is a soul crushing machine that’s about to get a whole lot more expensive. Time to buckle up Morty. It's gonna be a bumpy ride. And remember Morty grass tastes bad! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise! *burp*