Cadillac's Comeback: Hail to the King, Baby!

Golden Era? More Like Golden Shower!

Alright ladies and gentlemen Duke Nukem here and I've got some news that's gonna make your engines rev! General Motors those Detroit dinosaurs are trying to bring back Cadillac as the 'standard of the world.' Yeah right. Last time I checked the world standard was me kicking alien ass and getting all the babes. But hey let's see if they can pull it off. They're talkin' about a 'Golden Era' like it ain't been tarnished by decades of market share decline. Time to step up or step aside boys!

Reuss the Boss: Savior or Suicide Mission?

Mark Reuss GM's president is all hot and bothered about Cadillac. Calls himself a 'protector' and 'spiritual leader.' Sounds like a cult to me. But he's got a point: America needs a luxury brand that doesn't sound like it was named by a committee in Stuttgart or Tokyo. Let's hope he's got more than just passion because passion don't pay the bills – or buy me more bubblegum.

All Electric or All Broke?

The plan? Go all electric baby! They're gonna try and take on Tesla with their Lyriq and the Celestiq a $300,000 hand built beast. Sounds ambitious but I've seen bigger explosions. If they can actually deliver on the software – which they admit they've struggled with – maybe they'll have a chance. Otherwise it's 'Hail to the king baby!' followed by 'Game over man!'

Dome Sweet Dome: Where Dreams Are Made (and Cars Are Hatched)

Apparently there was this big meeting in GM's 'design dome' where they laid out the future of Cadillac. Sounds kinda like my bachelor pad but probably less… explosive. The idea is to make Cadillac unique not just a re skinned Chevy. Smart move but talk is cheap. I need to see some action and preferably some explosions.

Value Over Volume? More Like Valor Over Stupidity!

GM used to be all about 'volume over value,' pumping out cheap cars to make a quick buck. Now they're trying to go high end with Cadillac. Good call! Nobody wants a luxury car that feels like it was built by robots on a budget. Let's hope they can stick to the plan and not pull another ELR stunt. Remember that one? Yeah I try to forget it too.

China Syndrome: Cadillac's Kung Flu?

Here's the kicker: Cadillac's sales in China are tanking. Turns out the Chinese are buying Chinese cars. Who knew? GM's still trying to make it work but it's an uphill battle. Maybe they need to hire me to do some 'diplomacy.' I'm sure I could negotiate a deal...with extreme prejudice. As for Europe? They're trying to get back in the game after leaving in 2017. Good luck with that especially with all those German tanks rollin' around.