GM's New Battery Tech: Are They Finally Gonna Get It Right This Time?

EVs Batteries and My Everlasting Distrust

Alright alright settle down you beautiful baldies. Asmongold here ready to dissect the latest corporate promises. So GM bless their hearts is talking about some 'groundbreaking' EV battery tech. They're calling it lithium manganese rich (LMR). Sounds fancy right? Like something out of a sci fi movie but probably just another way for them to squeeze a few more bucks out of us while pretending to care about the environment. *laughs nervously*

Manganese? Sounds Like a Metal I Can't Even Pronounce

Apparently this LMR stuff uses manganese instead of the usual nickel and cobalt. They claim it's cheaper and more abundant. Okay cool. Cheaper is good. My wallet could use a break after all these Blizzard games. But let's not forget these are the same guys who gave us the Aztek. So excuse me if I'm not exactly holding my breath.

The 'Game Changing' Claim: A Tale as Old as Time

Ford's also jumping on the LMR bandwagon. 'Game changing,' they all say. It's always 'game changing' until your battery dies halfway through your road trip and you're stuck charging for three hours at some desolate gas station. Remember chat 'believe half of what you see and none of what you hear'. Especially when it comes from corporations.

Prismatic Cells: Squares Are the New Cylinders?

They're using 'prismatic' cells. Basically square batteries instead of the round ones or those weird pouches. I don't know man. As long as it holds a charge and doesn't explode I don't care if it's shaped like a damn dodecahedron. But hey maybe the squareness will help them fit more batteries in the Silverado. 'Cause you know trucks gotta be big.

Fewer Parts More Range Same Old Promises

GM is promising fewer parts more range and lower costs. Sure Jan. They're saying the LMR batteries will have 33% higher energy density than those LFP batteries. Sounds good on paper but until I see it with my own two eyes I'm taking it with a grain of salt. Remember Diablo Immortal? 'Do you guys not have phones?'

The Future of EVs: Copium or Legit?

So will this LMR battery tech save GM? Will it make EVs affordable for the average Joe? Maybe. But history tells us to be skeptical. These companies have a long track record of over promising and under delivering. I'm not saying it's impossible but I am saying don't sell your gas guzzlers just yet. Let's see if they can actually pull this off first. Because let's be real nobody wants to be stuck with a dead EV and a $80,000 paperweight. Alright chat that's enough corporate shilling for one day. Time to grind some transmogs! Zzzzzzz.