Bloody Hell What's Going On?
Right listen up you lot! I've just read this news about Gucci and it's enough to make me spit out my morning coffee. A 25% drop in sales? Are you taking the PISS?! Kering you've got a bigger problem than a risotto without seasoning. This is about Gucci once the shining star now looking like yesterday's reheated leftovers. Analysts are losing faith faster than I lose patience with a donkey chef who can't cook a proper bloody omelet. They are losing money and Gucci is taking them for a ride!
Yves Saint Laurent! Seriously?!
And it’s not just Gucci! Yves Saint Laurent is down 9% and Bottega Veneta is barely crawling along. What is this a bloody retirement home for luxury brands? JPMorgan's calling for a weak second quarter and TD Cowen's slashing price targets like I chop onions – which by the way I do with more precision than Kering's management seems to apply to its business strategy. Wake up you panini heads! You’re burning money faster than I burn a badly cooked steak!
China Crisis: Too Many Tariffs Not Enough Taste
The luxury market's facing headwinds especially in China. Tariffs economic slowdowns it's all adding up. But let's be honest even without these issues if your brand isn't resonating it's like serving a cold soup on a hot day – utterly pointless. Jelena Sokolova from Morningstar says Gucci's no longer top of mind. No sh*t Sherlock! When you lose your edge you become as memorable as a bland plate of pasta. 'Where's the lamb sauce?!'
Gucci's Overhaul: A Half Baked Plan?
Kering thinks they can fix this by tweaking some lines and bringing in Demna Gvasalia. Seriously? Another bloody designer? It's like putting lipstick on a pig! Yanmei Tang from Third Bridge hits the nail on the head: Gucci's brand identity is a mess. No clear direction mixed signals. It's a disaster waiting to happen. If you don't know where you're going any road will get you there! And in Gucci's case it's a road straight to hell.
Kering's Unloved Shares Tanking! What a Mess!
Kering's stock is down 27% year to date! That's worse than my temper when someone serves me an overcooked scallop. They are among Europe's most unloved luxury stocks and with good reason. Still Sokolova thinks a complete collapse is unlikely. She reckons Gucci's got brand recognition and pricing power. Maybe but right now they're squandering it faster than a drunk sailor on shore leave.
Fix It Or F*** Off!
So Kering here's the deal. You've got a bloody mess on your hands. You need to sort it out and fast. Get your act together find a clear vision and give consumers something to actually bloody well want! Otherwise you might as well pack your bags and get out of the kitchen. It's time to decide: are you going to be Michelin star material or just another bloody donkey?
Gucci Kering luxury sales slump turnaround fashion investment Demna Gvasalia Yves Saint Laurent Bottega Veneta
Comments
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CatGods
Gucci was always overrated.
honeydew82174
Gucci needs to rediscover its identity.
tazzie32
Time for Kering to take some risks!
MorbidAsphyxia
Kering needs a serious shake-up.
bentreed
Hopefully, Kering can turn things around.
Zemma
China's economic issues are killing luxury brands.
hansendt
Gordon's right, Gucci's lost its way!
mjustus
Demna Gvasalia? Not convinced.
ALBESURE113
Analysts are too harsh on Gucci.