Mind Reader? I Hardly Know 'Er!
Say Doc ever try pulling a rabbit out of a hat when the magician expects you to know which rabbit he's thinkin' of? That's what it's like when you expect your honey to read your mind! This Travers dame she's a headshrinker ya see? Says folks think their feelin's are as clear as mud to their partners. 'Illusion of transparency,' they call it. I call it a recipe for disaster! If you want carrots ask for carrots! Otherwise you might end up with turnips... and nobody wants turnips heh heh.
Keeping Score? That's Strictly for Baseball!
Now Doc let's talk about the scorecard. "He gave me flowers last Tuesday so I ain't doin' the dishes tonight." Sounds like a Bugs Bunny cartoon gone wrong don't it? This 'keeping score' business turns love into a game and somebody's always gotta lose. Real love ain't about 'tit for tat,' it's about givin' 'cause you wanna not 'cause you expect somethin' in return. Remember what Shakespeare said Doc: "We know what we are but know not what we may be." Don't become a stingy cartoon character! Give freely like I give you guys laughs!
Passive Aggressive? More Like Passive Depressive!
Ooh passive aggressive behavior! That's a spicy carrot! Instead of tellin' ya straight your partner starts givin' you the cold shoulder or makin' snide remarks. Like sayin' "Oh that's a *great* hat Bugs," when they really think it looks like roadkill. That ain't right folks! It's like tryin' to build a bridge with dynamite. Causes a lotta noise and nothin' gets built. Open communication Doc! That's the ticket! Ya gotta say what's on your mind or you'll just end up with a big ol' pile of resentment.
Backseat Driver? Get Your Own Car!
Now nobody likes a backseat driver especially not when they're drivin' your life! Constantly bein' told how to handle your job your hobbies your friends... it's enough to make a rabbit wanna dig a hole to China! Remember Doc "Of course you realize this means war!" between you and your partner when one of you starts actin' like the other's parent. Offer support not unsolicited advice. Unless of course they're about to step on a landmine. Then by all means yell!
Listening to Respond? More Like Listening to Ignore!
Ever talk to someone who's just waitin' for their turn to speak? They ain't listenin' they're plottin'! This here Travers lady calls it 'listening for the sake of responding.' I call it rude! Real listenin' means tryin' to understand your partner not just waitin' to drop your own two cents. If you ain't learnin' you ain't listenin'. And if you ain't listenin' you might as well be talkin' to a brick wall.
Don't Panic! It's Not the End of the Tunnel (Yet)!
So you recognize some of these habits in your own relationship? Don't go jumpin' off a cliff just yet Doc! Relationships take work. It's all about catchin' yourself in the act takin' a breath and tryin' somethin' different. Talk about it own it and try again. It ain't the habit itself that breaks the relationship it's the refusal to change it. Now if you'll excuse me I gotta go outsmart Yosemite Sam again. Eh he never learns...
relationship advice annoying habits communication couples therapy resentment passive-aggressive active listening relationship satisfaction conflict resolution healthy relationships
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SnowboarderBuzz
I think we all can relate to one or more of these habits. Good food for thought!
dantortorellijr
Haha! This is amazing. More relationship advice from cartoon characters, please!
muahmed
The 'keeping score' analogy is spot on. My ex and I were constantly doing that, and it definitely contributed to our downfall.
audrakroberts
This is gold! I always knew Bugs had some relationship wisdom hidden beneath that wisecracking exterior!
tomedmond50
This is the most entertaining and helpful relationship advice I've ever read. Thanks, Bugs!
selling4me
These are great points, and the Bugs Bunny delivery makes them even more memorable.
yellowriver2
I never thought I'd get relationship advice from a cartoon rabbit, but here we are!
jwmcdermid
It's funny because it's true! Gotta share this with my friends.