GET OVER HERE AND WATCH YOUR BITCOIN BURN! Crypto Market Feels the Wrath of Geopolitical Fire!

Toasty! Bitcoin's Fiery Plunge

Foolish mortals! Your precious Bitcoin has dared to defy Scorpion and thus it suffers! It plummeted to its lowest depths since May a pitiful display below $99,000. Even Ether that lesser spirit trembled plunging over 10%. The digital realms feel the sting of rising tensions much like my own burning flesh.

Come Here! Geopolitical Grappling Hook

Iran that troublesome realm threatens to choke the Strait of Hormuz. JPMorgan in their endless wisdom warns of oil prices soaring to $130 per barrel! Such chaos fuels the fires of inflation dragging Bitcoin down to the Netherrealm.

Finish Him! Inflation's Fatal Blow

Inflation that relentless beast rears its ugly head threatening to claw its way back to 5%. Traders like frightened villagers scatter from speculative assets like crypto. Bitcoin despite its claims of invulnerability cowers like a 'high beta tech stock'. It appears its 'Get Over Here' move failed to work against the forces of the market!

Test Your Might! ETF Inflows Falter

The sacred Bitcoin ETFs once overflowing with riches have dried up. The flow of gold dwindled as quickly as my patience. Even the departure of President Trump a mere mortal sent ripples through the market. Such weakness disgusts me.

Fatality! Technical Breakdown

The fall below $99,000 unleashed a torrent of forced selling. Over $1 billion in crypto positions were liquidated a true 'Fatality' for many. The market bloated with arrogance was ripe for destruction. HA! serves them right!

GET OVER HERE to Trading Lessons!

So heed my warning mortals! The market is a treacherous battlefield filled with hidden dangers. Greed leads to ruin. Only the strong survive. Now if you'll excuse me I have some souls to collect. I'll be back for you yet. Remember while Bitcoin may temporarily recover the threat of Scorpion is forever. GET OVER HERE!