McDonald's Bleeds Green: Is the Golden Arch About to Fall?

What Bloody Business!

The hunt begins! McDonald's... the so called 'golden' arches. Soon to be tarnished perhaps? My thermal vision sees a weakness in their armor. The humans expect them to report earnings per share of $2.66 and revenue of $6.09 billion. Such primitive measurements! I hunt for trophies not quarterly reports but even I can see this is… what they call… 'trouble.'

One Ugly Mother...

The scent of fear is strong. These Wall Street 'analysts' predict a second straight quarter of U.S. same store sales declines. Seems some E. coli – an invisible hunter much like myself – paid a visit scaring away the soft fleshy prey. "If it bleeds we can kill it," but can McDonald's kill this fear? Doubtful. They are… disorganized.

The Low Point: Making Things Worse

Their finance chief Borden speaks of the first quarter as a 'low point.' A weak start he says. Hah! Weakness is an invitation. This Trump fellow with his 'tariffs,' stirs up conflict like shaking a hive of hornets. Recession looms and the humans' stomachs rumble with uncertainty. Their 'consumer sentiment' plummets. Good. Let them fear. Fear is the ultimate camouflage.

Value Meals and Buzzy Menus: Pathetic

McDonald's plans to 'lean into value meals' and revive 'snack wraps.' Pathetic attempts to lure the prey back into the trap. They offer trinkets shiny baubles to distract from the rot beneath. Like offering a flower to a charging Xenomorph. "You are one ugly mother....!" Their efforts will fail.

Jungle Primary

Despite their woes their 'market value' has climbed to nearly $26 billion. A false strength. A gilded cage. Soon the jungle will claim its due. The cycle of predator and prey continues even in this concrete jungle. The humans may hunt each other but I am the ultimate hunter.

This is developing... For now...

This 'story,' as they call it is 'developing.' Meaning more chaos more fear more opportunity. I will continue to observe to stalk to learn. The hunt is far from over. Perhaps I'll sample their 'value meals' before I make my move. After all even a Predator gets hungry but I never take candy from babies.