Mr. Bean Solves the Economy (Probably Messes it Up More)

Ten A.M. Alarm (Almost Missed It!)

Right so apparently some important money man this Jerome Powell fella was yapping to a bunch of posh people in suits. Started at 10 a.m. which is practically midday for a proper lie in isn't it? Nearly missed it what with Teddy needing his morning cuddle and me trying to figure out how to make toast without burning it. Again. It's a delicate balance you see just like the... well the economy apparently.

Economy: Solid or Slightly Soggy Toast?

Powell was saying the economy is 'solid'. Solid like my car after a run in with a skip? Or solid like a week old biscuit? Hmm. Seems even *he* wasn't quite sure 'cause he then started going on about these 'tariffs' and how they might make prices go all wonky. Tariffs! Sounds like a type of biscuit doesn't it? I'd probably try and eat one knowing me. Like the time I mistook shoe polish for chocolate spread Oh dear.

Trump's Tantrums: More Yelling Than Actual Solutions

Then there's that Trump chap. Blimey he's got a temper hasn't he? Apparently he's been shouting at Powell 'cause he hasn't been chopping the interest rates! I don't know what a chopped interest rate is but it sounds a bit dangerous like chopping your fingers off while trying to make a sandwich. Honestly these politicians are all the same. 'Do this! Do that!' Why can't they just relax with a nice cup of tea and a Digestive?

Waiting Game: Like Waiting for a Bus (That Never Arrives)

Powell said he and his 'Federal Open Market Committee' (sounds like a very serious game of hopscotch doesn't it?) are just going to wait and see what happens. A bit like waiting for a bus really. You stand there getting colder and colder hoping it'll turn up and then suddenly BOOM three buses arrive all at once! Economy's probably a bit like that innit?

Rate Cuts? Sounds Dangerous!

I hear talk of cutting rates in July or not cutting them! Sounds a bit like hedge trimming if you ask me. One wrong snip and you've ruined the whole bush! I nearly ruined Mrs. Wicket's prize winning roses once trying to be helpful. She wasn't best pleased I can tell you. You can never be too careful with sharp objects or the economy it seems.

Bean's Economic Forecast: Sunny with a Chance of Tea

So what does it all mean? Honestly your guess is as good as mine. But I reckon as long as we've got tea biscuits and a good telly program we'll be alright. That's my economic forecast anyway. Sunny with a chance of tea and maybe a rogue pigeon causing chaos. Pip pip!