Oh, Booze! Constellation Brands' Stock Troubles? A Bean's Eye View!

Uh Oh Is The Booze Bus Broken?

Right then! I saw this thing about 'Constellation Brands'. Sounds a bit like when I tried to paint the ceiling doesn't it? All up and down! Apparently clever people at 'Jefferies' think the shares are now cheap. Like when I find a bargain on baked beans – a very good thing! They said something about the 'market being challenged'. Sounds like trying to parallel park my Mini with a sofa on the roof doesn't it?

Beer Troubles? Teddy Knows Best!

Apparently not enough people are drinking beer. I blame that newfangled fizzy water! Maybe if I offered everyone a free sausage roll with every pint things would improve. Teddy agrees. He says good beer helps with solving jigsaw puzzles. And with avoiding Mrs. Wicket! I remember when I tried brewing my own beer once the flatmates threw me out that day! Ohh was I in trouble!!

Wine Rescue Mission!

And 'wine turns profitable'. Good! Wine is very important for... well I don't know what it's important for. But it sounds fancy like having a cheese and pickle sandwich on a silver platter. I should try that maybe in my own way of course.

The Balance Sheet? Sounds Like a Bed Sheet!

They also talk about a 'solid balance sheet'. Sounds like one of Mrs. Wicket's freshly laundered bed sheets. Stiff probably. Important maybe? Either way I should check if it matches my socks because I found one in the fridge this morning.

Is It a Good Business? Or a Bad One?

So these Jefferies chaps think the sell off was too much. Like when I accidentally sold Teddy at the car boot sale for 50p. Horrible mistake! Horrible!. They say things will get better. Like when I accidentally superglued myself to the armchair and Mrs. Wicket had to call the fire brigade. Things eventually got better sort of but it was very smelly. So this Constellation Brands is just going to be just fine I hope so!

Mr. Bean's Stock Tips: Don't Ask!

Anyway I think I'll stick to buying baked beans. At least I know what to do with them mostly. Maybe I'll invest in a new rubber chicken. Now that's a good investment! If you think the stock is cheap buy it. Simple eh? Just don't come blaming me if it all goes wrong! As I always say "If you can't beat them join them… or just do something completely ridiculous!".