White House BANNED Reporters?! What Happens Next Will SHOCK You!

Waah! They Blocked the Media?!

Hello my friends! Jackie Chan here! So I hear the White House like a grumpy old man who doesn't like his noodles too spicy tried to block some reporters from Associated Press! Imagine that! It's like trying to do a stunt with a blindfold – dangerous and you're gonna end up with a few bumps and bruises! Remember what I always say: 'Sometimes it's better to lose than to win!'...but in this case someone needs to win for the sake of fair reporting!

Judge to the Rescue!

But fear not! A judge – and get this appointed by the same guy who wanted to block the reporters! – stepped in like a kung fu master! He said 'Hey you can't just block people because you don't like what they write!' It's like saying 'I'm only going to fight guys who are shorter than me!' Not very sporting eh? This Judge McFadden he's got some skills! He remind me of Drunken Master unexpectedly wise!

Gulf of...America?!

Now the story gets even funnier! Apparently the President wanted to rename the Gulf of Mexico! The Gulf of *America*! Haha! That's like me renaming all the ladders I climb 'Jackie's Ladders'! And the AP didn't play along! Oh dear what a mess. You know 'Don't try to be someone else. Be yourself and the right people will love you' but sometimes you just got to report the facts!

First Amendment Acrobatics!

This whole situation is like a complicated stunt sequence. The White House tries to block the AP jumps and sues the judge delivers a flying kick of justice! The First Amendment my friends is like my trusty stunt team – always there to catch you when you fall! 'I never wanted to be the next Bruce Lee. I wanted to be the first Jackie Chan' and I believe AP also don't want to be someone else but want to be the first and best AP!

A Victory for Free Noodles – I Mean Press!

So the AP won! Good for them! They get to go back into the Oval Office and Air Force One. This means more information for everyone! And that's a good thing. The AP lady Julie Pace hit the nail on the head! 'It's really about whether the government can control what you say,' Pace wrote. 'Every time I make a good movie I seem to make a bad one after' but hopefully this good news for the free press is here to stay! We don't need any more bad news!

Be Like Water...and Report the Truth!

So what's the moral of the story? Be like water my friends! Adapt flow and always fight for what's right! And remember whether you're doing kung fu or reporting the news honesty and integrity are the best weapons you can have! Now if you'll excuse me I have some noodles to eat! And maybe I will try to rename my kitchen...Jackie's Noodle Palace! Bye bye!