White House Advisor Says Trump Tariffs Like Meteorite Strike? Eh, I've Dodged Worse!

Meteorites? I've Jumped Off Taller Buildings!

Hello my friends! It's Jackie! I saw this news about some White House guy saying Trump's tariffs are as likely to cause problems as a meteorite hitting Earth. A meteorite eh? Ha! I've dodged bigger dangers falling off clock towers and sliding down skyscrapers! Tariffs sound complicated but I understand one thing: sometimes government policy feels like trying to choreograph a fight scene with 20 guys at once – chaotic!

The 'Drunken Master' of Economic Predictions

This advisor guy Stephen Miran he says predicting the future is hard. Well duh! I didn't need to learn 'Drunken Master' style to know that! Trying to guess the future is like trying to catch a fly with chopsticks! But he has a point. Sometimes things don't go as planned. You expect to land on a soft cushion but BAM! You hit a pile of cardboard boxes instead. Been there done that got the bruises to prove it!

Tariffs? More Like 'Tariffs ible' Jokes!

So they're saying prices haven't gone up much yet despite these tariffs. It's like when I try to cook – everything looks fine until you take a bite. Then suddenly the kitchen is on fire and everyone is ordering takeout! I hope these tariffs don't end up being a similar kind of disaster for you people!

Delays Delays Everywhere Delays!

Apparently Trump keeps delaying these tariffs. Ah delays! I know them well! 'Rush Hour 3'? Took forever! Making movies is like that sometimes. Always waiting for something! Waiting for the weather waiting for the explosion waiting for Chris Tucker to remember his lines! But hey sometimes a little delay is a good thing. Gives you time to rethink your stunt...or in this case maybe the tariffs?

Stockpiling? More Like 'Stock Piling' the Panic!

They say companies are stockpiling goods. It's like when I buy bubble wrap after a tough day. I don't need it but I feel better having it! Maybe these companies are just preparing for the worst case scenario. After all you never know when you might need a few extra boxes of noodles to fight off a horde of ninjas...or you know economic hardship.

So What Do We Do? Keep Calm and Keep Rolling!

Look I'm just a simple guy who likes to kick butt and make people laugh. I don't understand all this complicated economics stuff. But I do know one thing: you can't let fear control you. When life throws a meteorite at you duck roll and find a way to make it work! And if all else fails just remember my motto: 'Don't do drugs!'...and maybe just maybe buy a little extra bubble wrap.